We were on a long drive, and all I wanted was to get home and have sex. "There's something I want that's embarrassing," I said. I was afraid to tell him what it was. But then I did tell him.
"I want you to masturbate close to my face and then shoot your come into my mouth." I said. "And then I want to swallow it."
We made it home, and I took a quick shower. When I went to the bedroom, he'd already lit a candle and was in the bed. "What are you doing there?" I asked.
"Warming up the bed for you," he said. He was wearing a teeshirt and underwear. When he sat up to take his shirt off, I cheered.
We kissed, and I caressed his cock. It was large and hard. He took off his underwear for me. I was already naked.
Then he was on top of me, thrusting himself into me--a little deeper then a little deeper. I was overjoyed. "I want to come with you inside me," I told him, and he wanted that too. I rubbed my clitoris with my fingers as I rubbed my body up against him.
Soon I was about to come. "Come for me," he told me, and I did. I was afraid, right before the waves of pleasure hit me--afraid of the vulnerability of it, afraid of feeling too much. But then it was happening, and all I knew was happiness.
Then he moved his body toward my head and his cock close to my face. He started to masturbate there.
"Is this what you wanted?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said, and I watched him as well as I could from that close distance. I looked at his hand on his cock, and I looked at his beautiful candlelit face. As he got closer, I opened my mouth for him.
Then his come was squirting into my mouth. I felt it hit my tongue and lips. It felt its heat. I was so satisfied by it. I was dazzled by how perfect it was. And then I remembered to swallow.
He got his teeshirt and wiped off his cock. He wiped off my chin, which had come on it. And we cuddled close.
"How long do you want to keep me?" I asked.
"Forever," he said.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Friday, November 16, 2012
yours
Last night we were lying in bed cuddling. I didn't have a shirt on. You touched my nipples gently, and I was so happy. I felt my cunt ache with desire as the blood rushed in. My clitoris felt enlivened.
I pushed you back on the bed and went down on you. You were silent. Your cock was all the way in my mouth, and I moved my lips at the base of your cock. You murmured. I sucked your cock enthusiastically. You were pulling me up so your cock was aligned with my cunt. You wanted in me.
I took off my clothes, and you were on top of me. You slipped yourself inside of me, partially, and I struggled to get you all the way in. I think you like it when I beg you for it. When we pushed all the way together, I gasped. That's exactly what I wanted.
I rubbed my nipples with my thumbs as I felt your weight and reality on top of and inside of me.
You thrust gently a few times. I wanted you so badly, wanted to come so badly. I pushed against you.
Then you withdrew, not wanting to come. You rested your cock on my cunt for a few seconds. I wanted you back inside me. I pushed my cunt up against you in a rhythmic way.
Then you entered me again. I was excited and so aroused for you. You were still, and I tried to make you fuck me. I writhed beneath you and grabbed at your body. You thrust slightly, giving me what I wanted partially, and then pulled out again.
Then you were coming on my belly. I felt your cock spasm, and your beautiful balls were against me as you came.
You got a paper towel and cleaned us up. Then you sucked my right nipple and touched my left as I rubbed my clitoris and remembered how it felt when you were inside me. You sucked my nipple energetically, and I was so grateful for you.
Then I was coming, and I was completely yours.
I pushed you back on the bed and went down on you. You were silent. Your cock was all the way in my mouth, and I moved my lips at the base of your cock. You murmured. I sucked your cock enthusiastically. You were pulling me up so your cock was aligned with my cunt. You wanted in me.
I took off my clothes, and you were on top of me. You slipped yourself inside of me, partially, and I struggled to get you all the way in. I think you like it when I beg you for it. When we pushed all the way together, I gasped. That's exactly what I wanted.
I rubbed my nipples with my thumbs as I felt your weight and reality on top of and inside of me.
You thrust gently a few times. I wanted you so badly, wanted to come so badly. I pushed against you.
Then you withdrew, not wanting to come. You rested your cock on my cunt for a few seconds. I wanted you back inside me. I pushed my cunt up against you in a rhythmic way.
Then you entered me again. I was excited and so aroused for you. You were still, and I tried to make you fuck me. I writhed beneath you and grabbed at your body. You thrust slightly, giving me what I wanted partially, and then pulled out again.
Then you were coming on my belly. I felt your cock spasm, and your beautiful balls were against me as you came.
You got a paper towel and cleaned us up. Then you sucked my right nipple and touched my left as I rubbed my clitoris and remembered how it felt when you were inside me. You sucked my nipple energetically, and I was so grateful for you.
Then I was coming, and I was completely yours.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
trust
We were cuddling, and he was sleepy. I gave him some options. I really wanted to look at porn together but was too shy to ask. I wanted the sounds of porn. And I have a fantasy about going down on him while he watches porn of someone going down on someone. "We can keep cuddling, we can have sex, we can keep cuddling and have sex, you can unpack more boxes..."
"I like the first three," he said.
But he was falling asleep, and I suggested he nap while I took a shower. I took a shower and felt the warm water on my body. I washed my hair and got very clean. I imagined his tongue on my cunt--that's what I hoped would happen.
I went back to the bedroom, and my hair was dripping wet. He held his arms out to me. I was above him in bed, dripping water onto him.
Then we were cuddling again. Somehow I suggested that he give my nipples a lot of attention. I was happy but not satisfied.
"Would you go down on me?" I asked.
"Yes," he said, and he moved his head toward my cunt.
"It's been such a long time," I said.
He licked my clitoris, first gently then harder. I was excited, and he could hear that in the sounds I made. I touched my nipples. I wanted to come--I was straining toward him. I imagined him doing this to A, the one I love, other than anarchist boyfriend. I remember the first few times he went down on me, what a revelation it was of how good sex could feel, and I wanted to share him.
Then I wanted him to kiss my mouth, and he did. His mouth was slippery and fragrant from my cunt. I gently rubbed my clitoris as we kissed. My cunt was so wet from his mouth, and I touched its opening softly.
I decided to tell him what was going through my head. I wanted him inside me and wondered if my words would make him hard. "I want to see you go down on A," I said. "I want you to make A come. I want to see you fuck A. I want to see A go down on you. I want A to make you come." I imagined A's body and anarchist boyfriend's body joined in these ways, and I felt really turned on.
I was holding his cock, and I felt it get hard in my hand as I touched it. I felt the ridges at the head of his cock become defined, and I wanted to feel them with my cunt.
He positioned himself at the entrance to my cunt and eased himself inside of me. I rubbed my clitoris as he fucked me. And when I knew I was going to come, I removed my hand and pushed my body against him. I let his thrusts take me all the way there. My mouth was open wide in a voiceless scream as the pleasure hit me again and again.
"Do you like hearing my fantasies?" I asked him later.
"Yes," he said.
"Why is that?" I asked. "Because you feel closer to me?"
"Yes," he said. "And you to me?"
"I think so," I said. "But it's scary." It's scary to share my fantasies, and it can feel scary to come, too--to make myself that vulnerable to another person.
But I do it almost every day. I trust him.
"I like the first three," he said.
But he was falling asleep, and I suggested he nap while I took a shower. I took a shower and felt the warm water on my body. I washed my hair and got very clean. I imagined his tongue on my cunt--that's what I hoped would happen.
I went back to the bedroom, and my hair was dripping wet. He held his arms out to me. I was above him in bed, dripping water onto him.
Then we were cuddling again. Somehow I suggested that he give my nipples a lot of attention. I was happy but not satisfied.
"Would you go down on me?" I asked.
"Yes," he said, and he moved his head toward my cunt.
"It's been such a long time," I said.
He licked my clitoris, first gently then harder. I was excited, and he could hear that in the sounds I made. I touched my nipples. I wanted to come--I was straining toward him. I imagined him doing this to A, the one I love, other than anarchist boyfriend. I remember the first few times he went down on me, what a revelation it was of how good sex could feel, and I wanted to share him.
Then I wanted him to kiss my mouth, and he did. His mouth was slippery and fragrant from my cunt. I gently rubbed my clitoris as we kissed. My cunt was so wet from his mouth, and I touched its opening softly.
I decided to tell him what was going through my head. I wanted him inside me and wondered if my words would make him hard. "I want to see you go down on A," I said. "I want you to make A come. I want to see you fuck A. I want to see A go down on you. I want A to make you come." I imagined A's body and anarchist boyfriend's body joined in these ways, and I felt really turned on.
I was holding his cock, and I felt it get hard in my hand as I touched it. I felt the ridges at the head of his cock become defined, and I wanted to feel them with my cunt.
He positioned himself at the entrance to my cunt and eased himself inside of me. I rubbed my clitoris as he fucked me. And when I knew I was going to come, I removed my hand and pushed my body against him. I let his thrusts take me all the way there. My mouth was open wide in a voiceless scream as the pleasure hit me again and again.
"Do you like hearing my fantasies?" I asked him later.
"Yes," he said.
"Why is that?" I asked. "Because you feel closer to me?"
"Yes," he said. "And you to me?"
"I think so," I said. "But it's scary." It's scary to share my fantasies, and it can feel scary to come, too--to make myself that vulnerable to another person.
But I do it almost every day. I trust him.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Thursday, October 25, 2012
phone sex
We were both on trips. It was our first separation since we got together six months ago. How did it go? It went horribly. Sometimes he didn't call when he said he would. And once he hung up on me when some people walked into the room. I felt unloved, like a low priority, without him, despondent, miserable. I didn't know what to do. I wrote him emails. I wrote him a letter. Sometimes he did call when he said he would. But every time he was supposed to call, I got anxious. Would he, this time? It was terrible.
But after his conference, he was in the hotel lobby waiting until it was time for his taxi to come pick him up and take him to the train station. I was at my parents' house. It was around two in the morning his time. I had been lying in bed, touching my nipples, as I waited for him to call me.
"How many times have you masturbated since you left on your trip?" I asked.
"Zero," he said.
"Oh my god!" I said. "Why?"
"There's been no time," he said.
"Not in the shower?" I asked.
"No," he said. Then he asked, "How about you?"
"Zero," I said. I'd had no privacy until then. And nothing sexy was going on. I had been on a trip with my best friend E who is an ex but from so long ago it was a lifetime ago. Our last night together, we lay in our respective hotel room beds telling secrets. We did talk about sex, and it was a little titillating, but that's it for sexiness.
"Zero until now," I added. He was in the hotel lobby, which was abandoned, and I touched my nipples again.
How did we begin having phone sex? I reached into my underwear and started touching my slick clitoris, moaning quietly, saying his name, hoping my parents couldn't hear. It had been...about five days, five or six days, since I had last come--this after our usual habit of sex every day.
"I love you," I said. "I want you."
"I've loved you for a long time," he said.
He asked me if I could imagine him kissing me. He told me, "I want to put my cock inside you."
"I want that too," I said, and I whimpered.
At one point some tourists came into the hotel lobby. I heard their loud voices. I can't remember what language they were speaking. He moved away from them.
It was very quickly that I was coming, and I cried out for him as the waves of pleasure flowed through my body. "Aw!" he said as I came.
"I love you," I said.
"I love you," he said. "Now I'm cuddling you. Now I'm petting your hair."
"Thank you," I said.
I was alone in the bed. But I felt like he was with me. In a way he was.
It was our first time having phone sex. I'm hoping it was our last because I never want to be separated from him ever again.
But after his conference, he was in the hotel lobby waiting until it was time for his taxi to come pick him up and take him to the train station. I was at my parents' house. It was around two in the morning his time. I had been lying in bed, touching my nipples, as I waited for him to call me.
"How many times have you masturbated since you left on your trip?" I asked.
"Zero," he said.
"Oh my god!" I said. "Why?"
"There's been no time," he said.
"Not in the shower?" I asked.
"No," he said. Then he asked, "How about you?"
"Zero," I said. I'd had no privacy until then. And nothing sexy was going on. I had been on a trip with my best friend E who is an ex but from so long ago it was a lifetime ago. Our last night together, we lay in our respective hotel room beds telling secrets. We did talk about sex, and it was a little titillating, but that's it for sexiness.
"Zero until now," I added. He was in the hotel lobby, which was abandoned, and I touched my nipples again.
How did we begin having phone sex? I reached into my underwear and started touching my slick clitoris, moaning quietly, saying his name, hoping my parents couldn't hear. It had been...about five days, five or six days, since I had last come--this after our usual habit of sex every day.
"I love you," I said. "I want you."
"I've loved you for a long time," he said.
He asked me if I could imagine him kissing me. He told me, "I want to put my cock inside you."
"I want that too," I said, and I whimpered.
At one point some tourists came into the hotel lobby. I heard their loud voices. I can't remember what language they were speaking. He moved away from them.
It was very quickly that I was coming, and I cried out for him as the waves of pleasure flowed through my body. "Aw!" he said as I came.
"I love you," I said.
"I love you," he said. "Now I'm cuddling you. Now I'm petting your hair."
"Thank you," I said.
I was alone in the bed. But I felt like he was with me. In a way he was.
It was our first time having phone sex. I'm hoping it was our last because I never want to be separated from him ever again.
Monday, September 10, 2012
forever
I was thinking about him going inside of me, no condom--I think about it a lot--I daydream about him pumping me full of his come.
But I was thinking realistically--what if he slipped himself inside of me with no condom on, just so we could feel what it felt like? Just so we could have that experience? Then I thought about pregnancy, how the other day he said something was inconceivable, and I said, "That's what our baby is--inconceivable."
So it was on my mind, and then he took a shower and I took a shower and we were in bed. I went down on him for a moment. Then he was on top of me like he often is. I strained to get his cock on my vulva, strained to get his cock at the opening of my cunt. I was happy when he let his cock be there. We were kissing. I pushed up against him so that his cock entered me a tiny bit. What were we doing?
I pushed more, straining against him, so he slipped into me a little more. How could we be doing this? It was irresponsible and wrong. "Do you want me to go all the way in?" he asked. I nodded and smiled as he eased himself all the way up inside of me.
How did it feel? My god, it felt good. It was something I had never felt before, my loved boyfriend there inside me, so real and good. It felt good physically and at the same exact time it felt so good emotionally. I was experiencing the union I had wanted for so long.
I strained up against him more, trying to make him thrust. He withdrew and kept his cock there at the opening of my cunt. Again I pushed, and I was so happy when he allowed himself to enter me once more. I cried out as he slipped all the way inside me. He filled me.
"Fuck me," I thought but didn't say. I wanted his thrusts. I struggled around him. Again he withdrew. Again I got him back. I pushed my body against him as he was all the way inside me in a rhythmic way. He reached for my left wrist and held it down, then my right. I was ecstatic.
He told me he needed to be careful so he wouldn't come. He withdrew and somehow he was lying on his back. His cock was slick with my cunt's slipperiness, and I could see some of the fluid was white, at the base of his cock. I took him in my mouth.
I couldn't believe how good he tasted. I made him fuck my mouth, and I wanted his come in my throat so badly. I sucked and sucked. I could tell how good it felt for him, and he started to moan as he was getting close.
"I'm going to come soon," he said. My heart was full of love as I took him deep and he moaned in the way he does when he's coming in my mouth. I felt the come filling my mouth and felt his cock spasming.
I wanted to swallow. I wanted the come inside my body forever, his come becoming part of me.
But I held onto his leg to keep contact with him as I spit his semen into a teeshirt. Then I lay beside him, and I told him, "That was the hottest thing ever." We cuddled close. I moved his hand to my cunt, and he touched me there until I was coming too loudly. Sorry, neighbors.
I wanted to say that as he fucked me, his eyes were rolled up in his head, and it was beautiful. The whole thing was beautiful, and I will remember this day forever.
But I was thinking realistically--what if he slipped himself inside of me with no condom on, just so we could feel what it felt like? Just so we could have that experience? Then I thought about pregnancy, how the other day he said something was inconceivable, and I said, "That's what our baby is--inconceivable."
So it was on my mind, and then he took a shower and I took a shower and we were in bed. I went down on him for a moment. Then he was on top of me like he often is. I strained to get his cock on my vulva, strained to get his cock at the opening of my cunt. I was happy when he let his cock be there. We were kissing. I pushed up against him so that his cock entered me a tiny bit. What were we doing?
I pushed more, straining against him, so he slipped into me a little more. How could we be doing this? It was irresponsible and wrong. "Do you want me to go all the way in?" he asked. I nodded and smiled as he eased himself all the way up inside of me.
How did it feel? My god, it felt good. It was something I had never felt before, my loved boyfriend there inside me, so real and good. It felt good physically and at the same exact time it felt so good emotionally. I was experiencing the union I had wanted for so long.
I strained up against him more, trying to make him thrust. He withdrew and kept his cock there at the opening of my cunt. Again I pushed, and I was so happy when he allowed himself to enter me once more. I cried out as he slipped all the way inside me. He filled me.
"Fuck me," I thought but didn't say. I wanted his thrusts. I struggled around him. Again he withdrew. Again I got him back. I pushed my body against him as he was all the way inside me in a rhythmic way. He reached for my left wrist and held it down, then my right. I was ecstatic.
He told me he needed to be careful so he wouldn't come. He withdrew and somehow he was lying on his back. His cock was slick with my cunt's slipperiness, and I could see some of the fluid was white, at the base of his cock. I took him in my mouth.
I couldn't believe how good he tasted. I made him fuck my mouth, and I wanted his come in my throat so badly. I sucked and sucked. I could tell how good it felt for him, and he started to moan as he was getting close.
"I'm going to come soon," he said. My heart was full of love as I took him deep and he moaned in the way he does when he's coming in my mouth. I felt the come filling my mouth and felt his cock spasming.
I wanted to swallow. I wanted the come inside my body forever, his come becoming part of me.
But I held onto his leg to keep contact with him as I spit his semen into a teeshirt. Then I lay beside him, and I told him, "That was the hottest thing ever." We cuddled close. I moved his hand to my cunt, and he touched me there until I was coming too loudly. Sorry, neighbors.
I wanted to say that as he fucked me, his eyes were rolled up in his head, and it was beautiful. The whole thing was beautiful, and I will remember this day forever.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
kisses
me: Does it seem like our life is one long cuddle session?
boyfriend: I can't think of a better way to live.
boyfriend: I can't think of a better way to live.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
new best
Yesterday we were at a friend's house and had sex there. The friend was moving. She and her mom were doing a run, and anarchist boyfriend and I had the place to ourselves for half an hour. We made out on the loveseat. "Can I suck your cock?" I asked.
"We're at someone else's house," he said.
"It'll be okay," I said.
Then he opened his pants, and I knelt down to suck his cock. It was beautiful to have him in my mouth. And we worked toward his orgasm until he was coming.
Afterward I spit out his semen in the bathroom sink, and we cuddled. Later we got a call that they would be gone another half hour, so I washed my hands and masturbated on the loveseat while he touched my nipples. My shirt was pulled up, and my shorts were unzipped. Behind us was a window, and the afternoon light shone into the room in a lovely way.
Then today, we went on a long walk. We came home and I took a shower. He was already in bed, and I asked if we could cuddle. He put his computer away and took me in his arms. He casually touched my left nipple as his hands stroked my naked body. Soon I told him, "I want you. I want your cock."
He got up to take off his underwear, and I saw his erection. Then he lay on top of me, kissing me. Then he went down on me, licking me gently at first, then hard, stoking my clitoris with his tongue. I said, "Oh...oh. That feels so good." I also begged him, "Please," and, "Please do that to me."
I can't describe to you the actions he did. He licked the top part of my clitoris up and down. He licked the bottom side too, and sometimes licked both, flicking his tongue on the tip of my clitoris. He swirled his tongue around on the underside of my clitoris. I really liked that. I really liked everything he did.
Then he took a break from cunnilingus, coming up to my head to kiss me. I was a little sad he was done, but I understood.
Then he went down on me again. I'm not sure if my clitoris had relaxed while he was kissing my mouth. But it felt so good, what he did to me, that I was soon enlivened again. He did the same things with his tongue.
Then he took another break, kissing me, and I hoped he wasn't done. I reached down to caress his testicles. They were soft and lovable in my hand. I played with them and held them. I touched his cock gently then masturbated him for a moment.
Then he went down on me again. "If you do that more, I might come," I told him, when it felt so good, and I felt the intensification.
He stopped to kiss me again. This time he said, "I'm going to put on a condom." I was so, so happy he was going to fuck me. I thought I might come with him inside me, something I'd wanted for a long time. "Please fuck me," I begged. "I would give anything for you to fuck me."
Then he went down on me again. I was disappointed, but for only a second, because his tongue on my clitoris again was amazing. He went down on me as I moaned with pleasure.
Then he surfaced to kiss me again, and his hard cock was positioned right at the entrance to my cunt. He slid in, like a hot knife through butter. I felt the unique joy of having him inside me, and I almost came immediately. I felt that yearning and the excitement.
He was deep inside me, and he began to thrust. I felt again like I was about to come and didn't. His body was close against mine, and he began to fuck me harder. I made small sounds as I felt the near-fear anticipation of my orgasm. It seemed inevitable. I held onto his upper arms with my hands as my thumbs rubbed my nipples.
Then I knew it would happen. Suddenly my legs moved from their somewhat-relaxed position--my pelvis tilted so he was as deeply inside of me possible. I was grabbing onto his body, grabbing his back in an embrace so universal. And gradually he rocked me into my orgasm, and I cried out as the pleasure pumped through my body. I felt myself contract around his cock. I felt a complete, pure sensation of contentment and peace.
Finally it had happened. I felt like something very important had occurred. I felt irrevocably bonded to him. I had finally come with his cock inside of me. It was what I had wanted for so long.
We enjoyed the feelings. We were still. Then he began to fuck me again, deeply again, but with an animal force. I listened to his rhythmic breathing as he fucked me. I imagined that he was really turned on by the fact that he had made me come with his cock inside of me, imagined how happy he must be. And he fucked me, and then he abruptly stopped, and I felt his cock spasm as he came inside of me.
Again we stayed like that for a long time. We had been in a tight embrace, my legs wrapped around his legs. I untangled our legs, and he moved his face to mine to kiss me. "Hiya," he said. I smiled. My heart was full.
Then we cuddled close, and I told him, "I love you like I've never loved anyone else."
"I love you like I've never loved anyone else," he said.
"I want to tell you something, and I want you to respond compassionately," I said. He agreed. I said, "You give me the best sex of my life. Together we make the best sex of my life. You are the best lover I've ever had, and no one compares to you."
"We're perfect for each other," he told me.
"I want you to tell me that no one compares to me," I said.
"No one compares to you," he said. "You're the best."
I told you a couple weeks ago, dear reader, about the most satisfying orgasm I'd ever had. This sex that anarchist boyfriend and I had today supersedes that.
"We're at someone else's house," he said.
"It'll be okay," I said.
Then he opened his pants, and I knelt down to suck his cock. It was beautiful to have him in my mouth. And we worked toward his orgasm until he was coming.
Afterward I spit out his semen in the bathroom sink, and we cuddled. Later we got a call that they would be gone another half hour, so I washed my hands and masturbated on the loveseat while he touched my nipples. My shirt was pulled up, and my shorts were unzipped. Behind us was a window, and the afternoon light shone into the room in a lovely way.
Then today, we went on a long walk. We came home and I took a shower. He was already in bed, and I asked if we could cuddle. He put his computer away and took me in his arms. He casually touched my left nipple as his hands stroked my naked body. Soon I told him, "I want you. I want your cock."
He got up to take off his underwear, and I saw his erection. Then he lay on top of me, kissing me. Then he went down on me, licking me gently at first, then hard, stoking my clitoris with his tongue. I said, "Oh...oh. That feels so good." I also begged him, "Please," and, "Please do that to me."
I can't describe to you the actions he did. He licked the top part of my clitoris up and down. He licked the bottom side too, and sometimes licked both, flicking his tongue on the tip of my clitoris. He swirled his tongue around on the underside of my clitoris. I really liked that. I really liked everything he did.
Then he took a break from cunnilingus, coming up to my head to kiss me. I was a little sad he was done, but I understood.
Then he went down on me again. I'm not sure if my clitoris had relaxed while he was kissing my mouth. But it felt so good, what he did to me, that I was soon enlivened again. He did the same things with his tongue.
Then he took another break, kissing me, and I hoped he wasn't done. I reached down to caress his testicles. They were soft and lovable in my hand. I played with them and held them. I touched his cock gently then masturbated him for a moment.
Then he went down on me again. "If you do that more, I might come," I told him, when it felt so good, and I felt the intensification.
He stopped to kiss me again. This time he said, "I'm going to put on a condom." I was so, so happy he was going to fuck me. I thought I might come with him inside me, something I'd wanted for a long time. "Please fuck me," I begged. "I would give anything for you to fuck me."
Then he went down on me again. I was disappointed, but for only a second, because his tongue on my clitoris again was amazing. He went down on me as I moaned with pleasure.
Then he surfaced to kiss me again, and his hard cock was positioned right at the entrance to my cunt. He slid in, like a hot knife through butter. I felt the unique joy of having him inside me, and I almost came immediately. I felt that yearning and the excitement.
He was deep inside me, and he began to thrust. I felt again like I was about to come and didn't. His body was close against mine, and he began to fuck me harder. I made small sounds as I felt the near-fear anticipation of my orgasm. It seemed inevitable. I held onto his upper arms with my hands as my thumbs rubbed my nipples.
Then I knew it would happen. Suddenly my legs moved from their somewhat-relaxed position--my pelvis tilted so he was as deeply inside of me possible. I was grabbing onto his body, grabbing his back in an embrace so universal. And gradually he rocked me into my orgasm, and I cried out as the pleasure pumped through my body. I felt myself contract around his cock. I felt a complete, pure sensation of contentment and peace.
Finally it had happened. I felt like something very important had occurred. I felt irrevocably bonded to him. I had finally come with his cock inside of me. It was what I had wanted for so long.
We enjoyed the feelings. We were still. Then he began to fuck me again, deeply again, but with an animal force. I listened to his rhythmic breathing as he fucked me. I imagined that he was really turned on by the fact that he had made me come with his cock inside of me, imagined how happy he must be. And he fucked me, and then he abruptly stopped, and I felt his cock spasm as he came inside of me.
Again we stayed like that for a long time. We had been in a tight embrace, my legs wrapped around his legs. I untangled our legs, and he moved his face to mine to kiss me. "Hiya," he said. I smiled. My heart was full.
Then we cuddled close, and I told him, "I love you like I've never loved anyone else."
"I love you like I've never loved anyone else," he said.
"I want to tell you something, and I want you to respond compassionately," I said. He agreed. I said, "You give me the best sex of my life. Together we make the best sex of my life. You are the best lover I've ever had, and no one compares to you."
"We're perfect for each other," he told me.
"I want you to tell me that no one compares to me," I said.
"No one compares to you," he said. "You're the best."
I told you a couple weeks ago, dear reader, about the most satisfying orgasm I'd ever had. This sex that anarchist boyfriend and I had today supersedes that.
Monday, July 30, 2012
joyful girl
Oh, we fought again. I don't even want to talk about the content here. I was upset and too upset. I was doing laundry and had an excuse to get up and leave at one point. Then I was crying in the kitchen, not wanting to engage him, while at the same time wanting him to come find me.
He did come find me. And eventually it was late at night--the fight lasted so long. I cried and he cried.
So that was a week ago? Things got totally better. But last night we were at a pizza place and it got sort of reactivated. We were having this beautiful time, and we were making out in the booth--he said all was right with the world, and I whispered into his ear, "No, all is not right with the world--your cock isn't in my mouth," like having his cock in my mouth was the most important thing in the world to me. Our evening was sexually charged and I wanted to eat the pizza with him and go home and have sex with him.
But then he mentioned this thing I don't want to mention here and I was so turned off. I felt like it was insensitive for him to mention this thing when we were working toward something. I felt like we were on a date, and it wasn't the thing to mention on a date, not if you wanted to get laid, and I deeply wanted us to get laid.
So at first I tried to act like nothing was wrong because I hate myself for being so sensitive and easy to hurt. But it really doesn't work. I'm learning to speak up so we can work past it as quickly as possible.
As we walked to the truck, I told him how I felt, and he was sad, but he seemed to understand. We were driving home, and I didn't want to go home. "Can we not go home?" I asked. He said maybe we could go to the park--it was still light. It's summer.
So we sat in the truck, talking more, and the late afternoon light shone through. It was beautiful. Everything felt so real. We spoke of our love.
"Do you like me enough to marry me, but you just don't want to get married ever again?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Because I like you enough to marry you," he said.
"Aw--you're so sweet," I said. My heart overflowed with his kindness.
"So maybe we should just act like it," he said.
"You mean, be pretend married?" I asked.
"Will you be mine?" he asked.
"I already am," I said. "That's what I mean when I say I'm yours."
"I'm yours too," he said. We were cuddling, which is hard to do because the seats aren't so close, and all this talk of love made my clitoris alert.
So then we went home and cuddled more in bed and had amazing sex even though we had already had sex earlier in the day. I was lying next to him, close to him, telling him my fantasies.
"I want you to be standing up, and I would be kneeling and looking up at you. You would hold onto the back of my head and make me take your cock deeper into my mouth. You would tell me how to suck your cock, using imperative sentences." I imagined his hands on the back of my head and him telling me to suck his cock. I imagined gagging on it and getting off on his greed.
Then somehow it was happening--he wasn't standing up, but we were lying together--it was late at night--and I was going down on him, with his hands on the back of my head. It felt so, so sexy. I had wanted this for so long.
First I was kissing his cock. I was nuzzling his balls too. Then he told me to put my tongue at the tip of his cock, to push my tongue into his urethra, which I did. He made happy sounds. He told me to swirl my tongue around the head of his cock, which I did. He loved it and told me so.
Then he told me to take his cock all the way into my mouth. I did so, and he groaned. He moved my mouth up and down the shaft of his cock, very deeply, just a small amount in and out, almost all the way in. We moved together in this way.
Then he warmed me that he was going to come. I was excited. I was sucking and knew it would be a small amount of semen because he'd come just a few hours before, and I knew I was going to swallow it. I was secretly delighted with this knowledge. He continued to fuck my mouth, and he was gasping and moaning. Then he stopped, and I felt his cock spasm with come as he ejaculated. He came at the beginning of my throat, and I swallowed joyfully. Then I gave him a big smile and we kissed and cuddled.
Afterward, we talked about it. He said he liked playing with the edge, how much holding my head was okay. I said that turned me on too. "Did you like it when I swallowed your come?" I asked.
He said he did, but he didn't want to say so because he wanted to make sure that was what I wanted. Months ago I specified that I don't swallow, so I was breaking my own rule.
I had never felt so close to him. I was thrumming with happiness. We were thrumming with happiness together.
He did come find me. And eventually it was late at night--the fight lasted so long. I cried and he cried.
So that was a week ago? Things got totally better. But last night we were at a pizza place and it got sort of reactivated. We were having this beautiful time, and we were making out in the booth--he said all was right with the world, and I whispered into his ear, "No, all is not right with the world--your cock isn't in my mouth," like having his cock in my mouth was the most important thing in the world to me. Our evening was sexually charged and I wanted to eat the pizza with him and go home and have sex with him.
But then he mentioned this thing I don't want to mention here and I was so turned off. I felt like it was insensitive for him to mention this thing when we were working toward something. I felt like we were on a date, and it wasn't the thing to mention on a date, not if you wanted to get laid, and I deeply wanted us to get laid.
So at first I tried to act like nothing was wrong because I hate myself for being so sensitive and easy to hurt. But it really doesn't work. I'm learning to speak up so we can work past it as quickly as possible.
As we walked to the truck, I told him how I felt, and he was sad, but he seemed to understand. We were driving home, and I didn't want to go home. "Can we not go home?" I asked. He said maybe we could go to the park--it was still light. It's summer.
So we sat in the truck, talking more, and the late afternoon light shone through. It was beautiful. Everything felt so real. We spoke of our love.
"Do you like me enough to marry me, but you just don't want to get married ever again?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Because I like you enough to marry you," he said.
"Aw--you're so sweet," I said. My heart overflowed with his kindness.
"So maybe we should just act like it," he said.
"You mean, be pretend married?" I asked.
"Will you be mine?" he asked.
"I already am," I said. "That's what I mean when I say I'm yours."
"I'm yours too," he said. We were cuddling, which is hard to do because the seats aren't so close, and all this talk of love made my clitoris alert.
So then we went home and cuddled more in bed and had amazing sex even though we had already had sex earlier in the day. I was lying next to him, close to him, telling him my fantasies.
"I want you to be standing up, and I would be kneeling and looking up at you. You would hold onto the back of my head and make me take your cock deeper into my mouth. You would tell me how to suck your cock, using imperative sentences." I imagined his hands on the back of my head and him telling me to suck his cock. I imagined gagging on it and getting off on his greed.
Then somehow it was happening--he wasn't standing up, but we were lying together--it was late at night--and I was going down on him, with his hands on the back of my head. It felt so, so sexy. I had wanted this for so long.
First I was kissing his cock. I was nuzzling his balls too. Then he told me to put my tongue at the tip of his cock, to push my tongue into his urethra, which I did. He made happy sounds. He told me to swirl my tongue around the head of his cock, which I did. He loved it and told me so.
Then he told me to take his cock all the way into my mouth. I did so, and he groaned. He moved my mouth up and down the shaft of his cock, very deeply, just a small amount in and out, almost all the way in. We moved together in this way.
Then he warmed me that he was going to come. I was excited. I was sucking and knew it would be a small amount of semen because he'd come just a few hours before, and I knew I was going to swallow it. I was secretly delighted with this knowledge. He continued to fuck my mouth, and he was gasping and moaning. Then he stopped, and I felt his cock spasm with come as he ejaculated. He came at the beginning of my throat, and I swallowed joyfully. Then I gave him a big smile and we kissed and cuddled.
Afterward, we talked about it. He said he liked playing with the edge, how much holding my head was okay. I said that turned me on too. "Did you like it when I swallowed your come?" I asked.
He said he did, but he didn't want to say so because he wanted to make sure that was what I wanted. Months ago I specified that I don't swallow, so I was breaking my own rule.
I had never felt so close to him. I was thrumming with happiness. We were thrumming with happiness together.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
the best
We were in bed a few days ago. We were lying on our backs, and he was touching my cunt. I would get close to coming then ask him to stop. He touched me just the way I wanted to be touched.
"You're the sexiest man alive," I told him.
"I've loved you for a long time. I've wanted you for a long time," he told me. Those are some of my favorite things to hear.
He would touch me until I almost came then stopped when I asked him to. "What if I don't stop?" he asked.
He would touch me for only a few seconds before I was about to come, and finally I said, "I'm going to come."
He lovingly touched me, and I was crying out for him. Then I was coming, and it hit me like a powerful force. The waves of pleasure flowed through my body. He was pushing on my clitoris, not moving. Then he slowly moved his finger on my clitoris again.
Another wave of pleasure hit me. It felt like I was coming again. I cried out. Again he was pushing on my clitoris, still, and then he moved his finger again.
Another wave of pleasure hit me. I cried out louder, shocked that I was coming a third time. Again he was pushing on my clitoris, and then he moved his finger again.
The fourth wave of pleasure hit me. Again I cried out. I really couldn't believe what he'd done to me. I had never felt anything quite like this.
And that's how I had the most satisfying orgasm of my life.
"You're the sexiest man alive," I told him.
"I've loved you for a long time. I've wanted you for a long time," he told me. Those are some of my favorite things to hear.
He would touch me until I almost came then stopped when I asked him to. "What if I don't stop?" he asked.
He would touch me for only a few seconds before I was about to come, and finally I said, "I'm going to come."
He lovingly touched me, and I was crying out for him. Then I was coming, and it hit me like a powerful force. The waves of pleasure flowed through my body. He was pushing on my clitoris, not moving. Then he slowly moved his finger on my clitoris again.
Another wave of pleasure hit me. It felt like I was coming again. I cried out. Again he was pushing on my clitoris, still, and then he moved his finger again.
Another wave of pleasure hit me. I cried out louder, shocked that I was coming a third time. Again he was pushing on my clitoris, and then he moved his finger again.
The fourth wave of pleasure hit me. Again I cried out. I really couldn't believe what he'd done to me. I had never felt anything quite like this.
And that's how I had the most satisfying orgasm of my life.
Monday, July 16, 2012
when he surprised me
We were in the shower, and he said, "My penis is dirty. Why don't you wash it?"
Sunday, July 15, 2012
sacred
We went on a three day trip and didn't have sex the whole time. We were sleeping in a friend's living room. We were exhausted each night and cuddled each morning.
We got back to town yesterday evening and immediately went to the community garden where we have a garden plot to water. I picked cherry tomatoes. Anarchist boyfriend took over watering for me and we stood there holding hands. I was so tired from the six hour drive home. He asked me a question, and I was too delirious to think of an answer. "I don't care," I said. "I only care about one thing. You and me in bed."
He liked that idea and turned off the water hurriedly. He drove us home. "I'm going to take a shower," I said.
"Can I take a shower with you?" he asked.
We stood together in the shower. He washed my back, his soapy hands sliding over me. I washed my body and got nice and clean. He got hard and I held his cock for a moment.
In bed we kissed. "How are you feeling?" he asked me, and I listed him a list. I remember "amorous" was on the list, and when I asked him how he was feeling, he said, "Amorous for you." We kissed more. He had his hair down and looked entirely sexy above me.
"Who in this family wants to go down on the other person?" I asked. We both said "me," but if I go down on him then he can't go down on me if we kiss--we're really cautious about fertility. I wanted to go down on him, but he wanted to go down on me. He won. Or I won. He was going to go down on me first.
I scooted back on the bed so he could be comfortable. He held my legs. His tongue was on my clitoris. He licked and licked. I trust him more. I felt his tongue on me pushing hard. I made small sounds and felt more and more pleasure. But I didn't want to come that way--I wanted to come with him inside me. But I couldn't ask him to stop--it felt so good. "If you keep doing that, I'm going to come," I told him.
"Mm hmm," he said, and his tongue's motions intensified.
Soon I felt the feelings growing inside me. I accepted the inevitability. I gave myself to him, and at the moment that I went over the edge, I made a loud cry. Part of my mind was aware that it was loud, but I didn't care. I just wanted to feel the way I was feeling in that moment and hear the sound from my throat.
He kept licking me as I kept coming. I felt my head rise up off the pillow and back down again as the orgasm continued. I was conscious of that happening a few times as I was a being of complete pleasure.
Then his licks became more gentle and slowed. He wiped my cunt's juices off his face on a washcloth and lay down beside me. We kissed and caressed one another.
Then I pushed him away and went down on him. His cock was responsive, and I loved the sounds he made. I was afraid of him coming in my mouth because of the quantity of semen I expected. Maybe he sensed my hesitation when he said, "I better get inside you."
He was on his knees as I lay back. He put on a condom. My legs were up in the air but bent as he slid himself all the way into me. I made a different from usual sound as the pain and pleasure were together. With every thrust it hurt and felt like exactly what I wanted at the same time. He felt large and so real and vibrant inside me.
His motions were small, and his cock was in me so deeply. I wanted him to come so badly, and I knew it would happen. He made unusual sounds too as he made his slight thrusts, and the sounds got more impassioned until finally he stopped moving, all the way inside me, and I felt the semen flow through his cock and into me--I felt his cock's spasms.
I felt validated. He stayed inside me like that. I felt we had experienced a sacred union. No matter what happened in the future, and no matter what happened in the past, nothing could change that.
This morning we had sex again. He asked me, "Did it hurt last night, when I went inside you so deeply?"
I explained how it had hurt and how I wanted that.
"What did it feel like?" he asked and said something about not having a vagina.
"It felt like my guts needed to move to make room for you," I said. It was more than that, though. Like being entered by something too large but deliciously too large.
We got back to town yesterday evening and immediately went to the community garden where we have a garden plot to water. I picked cherry tomatoes. Anarchist boyfriend took over watering for me and we stood there holding hands. I was so tired from the six hour drive home. He asked me a question, and I was too delirious to think of an answer. "I don't care," I said. "I only care about one thing. You and me in bed."
He liked that idea and turned off the water hurriedly. He drove us home. "I'm going to take a shower," I said.
"Can I take a shower with you?" he asked.
We stood together in the shower. He washed my back, his soapy hands sliding over me. I washed my body and got nice and clean. He got hard and I held his cock for a moment.
In bed we kissed. "How are you feeling?" he asked me, and I listed him a list. I remember "amorous" was on the list, and when I asked him how he was feeling, he said, "Amorous for you." We kissed more. He had his hair down and looked entirely sexy above me.
"Who in this family wants to go down on the other person?" I asked. We both said "me," but if I go down on him then he can't go down on me if we kiss--we're really cautious about fertility. I wanted to go down on him, but he wanted to go down on me. He won. Or I won. He was going to go down on me first.
I scooted back on the bed so he could be comfortable. He held my legs. His tongue was on my clitoris. He licked and licked. I trust him more. I felt his tongue on me pushing hard. I made small sounds and felt more and more pleasure. But I didn't want to come that way--I wanted to come with him inside me. But I couldn't ask him to stop--it felt so good. "If you keep doing that, I'm going to come," I told him.
"Mm hmm," he said, and his tongue's motions intensified.
Soon I felt the feelings growing inside me. I accepted the inevitability. I gave myself to him, and at the moment that I went over the edge, I made a loud cry. Part of my mind was aware that it was loud, but I didn't care. I just wanted to feel the way I was feeling in that moment and hear the sound from my throat.
He kept licking me as I kept coming. I felt my head rise up off the pillow and back down again as the orgasm continued. I was conscious of that happening a few times as I was a being of complete pleasure.
Then his licks became more gentle and slowed. He wiped my cunt's juices off his face on a washcloth and lay down beside me. We kissed and caressed one another.
Then I pushed him away and went down on him. His cock was responsive, and I loved the sounds he made. I was afraid of him coming in my mouth because of the quantity of semen I expected. Maybe he sensed my hesitation when he said, "I better get inside you."
He was on his knees as I lay back. He put on a condom. My legs were up in the air but bent as he slid himself all the way into me. I made a different from usual sound as the pain and pleasure were together. With every thrust it hurt and felt like exactly what I wanted at the same time. He felt large and so real and vibrant inside me.
His motions were small, and his cock was in me so deeply. I wanted him to come so badly, and I knew it would happen. He made unusual sounds too as he made his slight thrusts, and the sounds got more impassioned until finally he stopped moving, all the way inside me, and I felt the semen flow through his cock and into me--I felt his cock's spasms.
I felt validated. He stayed inside me like that. I felt we had experienced a sacred union. No matter what happened in the future, and no matter what happened in the past, nothing could change that.
This morning we had sex again. He asked me, "Did it hurt last night, when I went inside you so deeply?"
I explained how it had hurt and how I wanted that.
"What did it feel like?" he asked and said something about not having a vagina.
"It felt like my guts needed to move to make room for you," I said. It was more than that, though. Like being entered by something too large but deliciously too large.
Saturday, July 7, 2012
an email
Good morning! I finally devoured the materials you sent. They were
awesome. Thank you! Last night anarchist boyfriend and I looked at the pictures and
videos. Just now I finished with all the text. I can't decide what I
like best--maybe the text. If you have more, I'd love that. I want to
tell you my favorite, but I can't decide. I really like the story about
S. Maybe that's my favorite. I enjoyed most a moment of boundary
crossing, or agreement breaking, or something like that. Yesterday I
read most of the stuff while anarchist boyfriend was outside shoveling dirt. I missed
him powerfully and wandered outside where we kissed. He asked how dirty his face was. "Not dirty," I said, touching his face. Then I touched his chest and sides and found myself touching the top of his pants as if I
would slip my fingers under them. Later we had sex where I kept telling
him to stop so I wouldn't come. His fingers were on me, and he brought
me to the edge again and again. I wanted to come with his cock up
inside me, something that we had never done before. That ended up not
happening, though we were deliciously close. Anyway, that was afternoon
and we had sex again last night, and maybe I should be blogging about
all this.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
repair
I realized that the way I feel about him is the way I feel when I look at beautiful art, an aesthetic experience. My mind is expanded. Something crucial inside is nourished. Something inside is repaired. I feel more whole again. I thought it was only art that made me feel this way, but it's him too.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
your body
I love your body for its soft skin and smoothness,
for its responsiveness, because it's you.
I like looking at you--I could stare and stare.
Your form is pleasing to the eye.
I like your thinness and the beauty of your limbs,
which are so thin but strong.
I like your beautiful hands and your long, thick hair.
Those were the first two things I allowed myself to admire about your body.
I like your feet with their vulnerability.
I like your vibrant cock with its strange combination of vulnerability and strength.
I like your balls which smell so delicious.
I'm in love with your tummy.
I like its subtle shape and touching it.
I like your gorgeous rounded, sexy ass.
I like your head, where your brain lives.
I like your face, with its sweet expressions,
your beautiful mouth, your sensitive tongue that pleases me.
I like your eyes and their depth, the better to see me with.
I like your delicate ears which so surprised me.
I like your honest chest with its beloved heart and lungs.
I like your compassionate shoulders.
I like your generous and good hands.
I like your alive and gentle hands.
for its responsiveness, because it's you.
I like looking at you--I could stare and stare.
Your form is pleasing to the eye.
I like your thinness and the beauty of your limbs,
which are so thin but strong.
I like your beautiful hands and your long, thick hair.
Those were the first two things I allowed myself to admire about your body.
I like your feet with their vulnerability.
I like your vibrant cock with its strange combination of vulnerability and strength.
I like your balls which smell so delicious.
I'm in love with your tummy.
I like its subtle shape and touching it.
I like your gorgeous rounded, sexy ass.
I like your head, where your brain lives.
I like your face, with its sweet expressions,
your beautiful mouth, your sensitive tongue that pleases me.
I like your eyes and their depth, the better to see me with.
I like your delicate ears which so surprised me.
I like your honest chest with its beloved heart and lungs.
I like your compassionate shoulders.
I like your generous and good hands.
I like your alive and gentle hands.
Monday, June 25, 2012
four fantasies
We saw friends and then were deciding what to do. I don't remember option one, but option two was going to bed. "Whatever would we do there?" I asked.
"I'm sure we could think of something," he said.
We chose bed. I lay on my back with my shirt and bra off. I had a buckwehat hull pillow on my chest between my breasts. I told him I liked the weight of it. He said he could be the weight. So he moved the pillow to my vulva and climbed on top of me. We kissed.
Then he was lying to the side of me, touching my cunt through my clothes. I liked the way he rubbed me there, when he hit just the right spot. I liked when he would suddenly pat me.
And I was touching his cock. I kept licking my hand to put more spit on him. He was beautiful and good in my hand.
"I want to tell you what I think about when we're kissing and when you're touching me, but I'm scared," I said.
"Mm hm," he said.
"Tell me I don't have to be scared to tell you anything," I said.
"You don't have to be scared to tell me anything," he said.
Slowly I began to tell him, with lots of pauses and excited fear. "I would like..."
"Mm hm?" he said.
"For us to listen to pornography while we make out," I said. I like porn's sounds. I like to imagine other people's sounds in the room. I imagined him imagining it. I haven't seen or heard any porn in months, quite a long time.
"Mm hm," he said.
"And sometime when we have sex all day, I would like to suck your cock while you look at pornography," I said. "I really want that. On a day where we have sex all day, not the first couple times you come, but later." I have wanted to have sex all day for quite a while. He says when I get back from New York we'll have sex all day.
"Do you like my fantasies?" I asked.
"I do," he said. His cock was hard in my hand. Those were the easy two. I got nervous again.
"I have this other fantasy, not a very detailed one," I said, "where I come home and you're fucking N."
"What am I doing to her?" he asked.
"Oh, she's lying on her back, and you're fucking her enthusiastically." I said.
"You weren't expecting it?" he asked.
"No," I said.
"How do you feel about it?" he asked.
I thought for a minute. "I'm not sure," I said.
"And we tell you to join us?" he asked.
I laughed. "I join you," I said.
"Does N go down on you?" he asked.
"No," I said. "I don't trust anyone to go down on me but you." I guess it's my fantasy and I could trust her in my fantasy, but I don't.
We talked about how I would join them. "Would you go down on her while I fucked you?" he asked.
"Sure," I said, imagining it.
"Would you like to taste her on my cock after I've been fucking her?" he asked.
"Yes," I said.
"How do you think she'd taste?" he asked.
"Good," I said. "Probably like me. Oh, that feels good," I said. This whole time he had been touching my cunt through my clothes, and I was so aroused.
Then I told him this other fantasy that I have that I'm not going to recount to you, dear reader, because it's about someone I'm afraid might read this blog one day, and I don't want to upset her.
Then I moved my hand under my clothes, and again the wetness there amazed me. My clitoris was slick. "Would you do me a favor," I asked, "and fuck my mouth?"
"Yes," he said. As I masturbated, he fucked my mouth. The head of his cock went deeper than usual, and I liked the angle. He started making small sounds then pulled out and knelt by my head, masturbating over my face.
"Can I come?" he asked.
"Just a minute," I said. I masturbated more quickly and started making small sounds. Then I came joyfully as he came on my face. Some of his semen was on my chin, and some dripped onto the bed. Later I found a little in my hair.
He got a tea towel from the laundry basket and gently wiped my face. He offered it to me so I could wipe my hand. Then we cuddled and talked and fell asleep, the hall light still on.
"I'm sure we could think of something," he said.
We chose bed. I lay on my back with my shirt and bra off. I had a buckwehat hull pillow on my chest between my breasts. I told him I liked the weight of it. He said he could be the weight. So he moved the pillow to my vulva and climbed on top of me. We kissed.
Then he was lying to the side of me, touching my cunt through my clothes. I liked the way he rubbed me there, when he hit just the right spot. I liked when he would suddenly pat me.
And I was touching his cock. I kept licking my hand to put more spit on him. He was beautiful and good in my hand.
"I want to tell you what I think about when we're kissing and when you're touching me, but I'm scared," I said.
"Mm hm," he said.
"Tell me I don't have to be scared to tell you anything," I said.
"You don't have to be scared to tell me anything," he said.
Slowly I began to tell him, with lots of pauses and excited fear. "I would like..."
"Mm hm?" he said.
"For us to listen to pornography while we make out," I said. I like porn's sounds. I like to imagine other people's sounds in the room. I imagined him imagining it. I haven't seen or heard any porn in months, quite a long time.
"Mm hm," he said.
"And sometime when we have sex all day, I would like to suck your cock while you look at pornography," I said. "I really want that. On a day where we have sex all day, not the first couple times you come, but later." I have wanted to have sex all day for quite a while. He says when I get back from New York we'll have sex all day.
"Do you like my fantasies?" I asked.
"I do," he said. His cock was hard in my hand. Those were the easy two. I got nervous again.
"I have this other fantasy, not a very detailed one," I said, "where I come home and you're fucking N."
"What am I doing to her?" he asked.
"Oh, she's lying on her back, and you're fucking her enthusiastically." I said.
"You weren't expecting it?" he asked.
"No," I said.
"How do you feel about it?" he asked.
I thought for a minute. "I'm not sure," I said.
"And we tell you to join us?" he asked.
I laughed. "I join you," I said.
"Does N go down on you?" he asked.
"No," I said. "I don't trust anyone to go down on me but you." I guess it's my fantasy and I could trust her in my fantasy, but I don't.
We talked about how I would join them. "Would you go down on her while I fucked you?" he asked.
"Sure," I said, imagining it.
"Would you like to taste her on my cock after I've been fucking her?" he asked.
"Yes," I said.
"How do you think she'd taste?" he asked.
"Good," I said. "Probably like me. Oh, that feels good," I said. This whole time he had been touching my cunt through my clothes, and I was so aroused.
Then I told him this other fantasy that I have that I'm not going to recount to you, dear reader, because it's about someone I'm afraid might read this blog one day, and I don't want to upset her.
Then I moved my hand under my clothes, and again the wetness there amazed me. My clitoris was slick. "Would you do me a favor," I asked, "and fuck my mouth?"
"Yes," he said. As I masturbated, he fucked my mouth. The head of his cock went deeper than usual, and I liked the angle. He started making small sounds then pulled out and knelt by my head, masturbating over my face.
"Can I come?" he asked.
"Just a minute," I said. I masturbated more quickly and started making small sounds. Then I came joyfully as he came on my face. Some of his semen was on my chin, and some dripped onto the bed. Later I found a little in my hair.
He got a tea towel from the laundry basket and gently wiped my face. He offered it to me so I could wipe my hand. Then we cuddled and talked and fell asleep, the hall light still on.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
exactly what I wanted
I never told you about what happened a week ago when I asked him to fuck me as I said no. Our safeword was "safeword" and I didn't need to use it. He entered me and rode me beautifully.
"No," I said quietly. He didn't respond but kept fucking me as if I hadn't said anything.
"No," I said again. Again he didn't respond and continued with what he was doing.
Then I said his name and, "No," more urgently. Again he kept fucking me, with growing intensity, and I was so turned on. I wanted this so badly.
"No," I pleaded again. He fucked me harder and then stopped. I felt his semen pumping out of his cock and into me, into the condom. I was so happy I had gotten exactly what I wanted.
Then last night we kissed and kissed. He was naked and on top of me. He's thin and didn't hurt me. His arms are strong.
I asked him, "Will you do me a sexual favor?"
"Yes," he said, without asking what it was.
"Will you lick my nipples?" I asked.
He moved his head down from my mouth to my left breast. I felt his tongue on me. I loved the feeling. He worked on my left breast then my right, back and forth.
"That has an effect on my cunt," I said.
"What does it feel like?" he asked.
"I think I can feel the blood rushing to my cunt," I said. "It's a warm feeling, and I really like it. There's also an ache."
I watched him licking me. He looked so beautiful. "That feels so good," I said, over and over again. I could see his gorgeous tongue. I liked his willingness and his careful attention.
"Do you like to masturbate for a long time or just a short time?" I asked. I had only seem him masturbate for a short time.
"Both," he said. "How about you?"
"Me too--both," I said. Then I asked for something I had wanted. "Do you think we could masturbate and come at the same time?"
"Yes," he said.
I masturbated while he licked my nipples. Then I heard the rhythmic sound of his hand moving on his cock. "I like the way that sounds," I said. My right hand was in my shorts as I rubbed my clitoris.
"I want to see," I told him. He moved to his knees and was on my left side. I watched him masturbate.
I was almost coming, amazed at my wetness. That long session of kissing had had an effect on me too. I continued to masturbate, keeping myself at the edge as I tried to gauge how close he was.
Then I was making small sounds, and he looked so beautiful and happy. I knew he was about to come, and I brought myself there. I felt his semen spurting out onto my belly, and I rubbed my clitoris harder, allowing myself to come. We looked into one another's eyes.
"No," I said quietly. He didn't respond but kept fucking me as if I hadn't said anything.
"No," I said again. Again he didn't respond and continued with what he was doing.
Then I said his name and, "No," more urgently. Again he kept fucking me, with growing intensity, and I was so turned on. I wanted this so badly.
"No," I pleaded again. He fucked me harder and then stopped. I felt his semen pumping out of his cock and into me, into the condom. I was so happy I had gotten exactly what I wanted.
Then last night we kissed and kissed. He was naked and on top of me. He's thin and didn't hurt me. His arms are strong.
I asked him, "Will you do me a sexual favor?"
"Yes," he said, without asking what it was.
"Will you lick my nipples?" I asked.
He moved his head down from my mouth to my left breast. I felt his tongue on me. I loved the feeling. He worked on my left breast then my right, back and forth.
"That has an effect on my cunt," I said.
"What does it feel like?" he asked.
"I think I can feel the blood rushing to my cunt," I said. "It's a warm feeling, and I really like it. There's also an ache."
I watched him licking me. He looked so beautiful. "That feels so good," I said, over and over again. I could see his gorgeous tongue. I liked his willingness and his careful attention.
"Do you like to masturbate for a long time or just a short time?" I asked. I had only seem him masturbate for a short time.
"Both," he said. "How about you?"
"Me too--both," I said. Then I asked for something I had wanted. "Do you think we could masturbate and come at the same time?"
"Yes," he said.
I masturbated while he licked my nipples. Then I heard the rhythmic sound of his hand moving on his cock. "I like the way that sounds," I said. My right hand was in my shorts as I rubbed my clitoris.
"I want to see," I told him. He moved to his knees and was on my left side. I watched him masturbate.
I was almost coming, amazed at my wetness. That long session of kissing had had an effect on me too. I continued to masturbate, keeping myself at the edge as I tried to gauge how close he was.
Then I was making small sounds, and he looked so beautiful and happy. I knew he was about to come, and I brought myself there. I felt his semen spurting out onto my belly, and I rubbed my clitoris harder, allowing myself to come. We looked into one another's eyes.
Friday, June 15, 2012
sucking his cock
He was lying on his back, and I was going down on him. We were both naked. He had two pillows under his hips. I was intending to ride him, but I thought I'd suck his cock first. But he seemed to be really liking what I was doing. He made small happy sounds.
For weeks I had been going down on him--since the beginning. I love his cock in my mouth. I like its beautiful shapes and its generous size. I like how easily he gets an erection. I like its sensitivity and eagerness, its honesty. His cock seems straightforward and like it has nothing to hide.
For weeks I'd been going down on him, but he always warned me when he was about to come and I'd stop. I had fantasized about him coming in my mouth. "You know how you can want something that you're not actually going to have?" I asked. "I really want you to come in my mouth."
What about this was scaring me? I was afraid of choking on his semen? I was afraid of not being in control? I was afraid of not liking it?
But as I sucked his cock, I realized it was time. He said, "I'm going to come," and I continued going down on him, taking him deep into my mouth so the head of his cock was at the beginning of my throat.
"I'm going to come," he said, and he did. I was surprised even though I had expected it. Suddenly his warm semen was pumping into my mouth. I slowed down and enjoyed his sounds and feeling the sensations of what was happening in my mouth. I liked the way he moved. I could feel everything.
I imagined his come in my mouth--I imagined it there, alive and good. I considered swallowing and didn't. I spit it into my shirt and smiled at him. He looked very happy.
I was very happy too--I felt something important had happened between us. I felt like we had broken through to another level of trust. And I imagined our lives together, seeing the future indefinitely, of me sucking his cock.
For weeks I had been going down on him--since the beginning. I love his cock in my mouth. I like its beautiful shapes and its generous size. I like how easily he gets an erection. I like its sensitivity and eagerness, its honesty. His cock seems straightforward and like it has nothing to hide.
For weeks I'd been going down on him, but he always warned me when he was about to come and I'd stop. I had fantasized about him coming in my mouth. "You know how you can want something that you're not actually going to have?" I asked. "I really want you to come in my mouth."
What about this was scaring me? I was afraid of choking on his semen? I was afraid of not being in control? I was afraid of not liking it?
But as I sucked his cock, I realized it was time. He said, "I'm going to come," and I continued going down on him, taking him deep into my mouth so the head of his cock was at the beginning of my throat.
"I'm going to come," he said, and he did. I was surprised even though I had expected it. Suddenly his warm semen was pumping into my mouth. I slowed down and enjoyed his sounds and feeling the sensations of what was happening in my mouth. I liked the way he moved. I could feel everything.
I imagined his come in my mouth--I imagined it there, alive and good. I considered swallowing and didn't. I spit it into my shirt and smiled at him. He looked very happy.
I was very happy too--I felt something important had happened between us. I felt like we had broken through to another level of trust. And I imagined our lives together, seeing the future indefinitely, of me sucking his cock.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
licking me
I want to tell you about when I finally came on his tongue. He's been going down on me for weeks. Previously, I was very shy about being gone down upon. It felt like the most vulnerable thing I could do with someone. And I didn't like it.
But once he asked, "I wonder how you taste fresh out of the shower?" and I shyly let him taste.
So he went down on me a good handful of times, and I did like it--I did like how it felt, those slow figure eights, and up and down, and side to side, quicker, hard, so gentle it almost tickled...
But I knew I wouldn't come. Once I was close, and it just didn't happen.
But a few days ago, he was licking me. I lay relaxed on my back. He was between my legs, doing with his tongue the things he likes to do, and I felt the need growing within me. He seemed insistent, like he knew it was going to happen this time--assertive, almost aggressive. I was very curious.
I think I hadn't come on his tongue before because I wouldn't let myself relax. Maybe I just didn't know him well enough? Well, that can't be true because I remember a long time ago--the summer I was 16--coming on the tongue of a near-stranger. That was 19 years ago. And I fell in love with that man, that night, on the ground beside the tennis courts at the summer art school where he was an actor and I was a writer, both of us a long way from home.
But I was already quite in love with this M, anarchist boyfriend. And as I lay there on my back in our bedroom--the bedroom we had shared for less than two weeks--we'd had our first at-home sex there, so comfortable and finally, finally safe, not worrying about his roommate's footsteps on the stairs, not furtive--I finally relaxed.
Sex can be about tension, maintaining an intensity, but it feels good to relax in the middle of it, to relax emotionally.
So he was doing his intent work on my clitoris, insistent, and I let go. It went on for a long time, and I admired his drive.
Then I could tell I was probably going to come. Then I could tell I was going to come. I felt a little scared, but it was going to happen. I think my sounds indicated that I was going to come--he knew, and he responded with enthusiasm, heartened.
Then I was coming on his tongue. It was amazing, and it was too much. I wanted him to back off but not stop, but I had no way of communicating that. I reached down to my cunt and pressed my labia together with my fingers. His enthusiasm was undeterred. I was overcome with emotion.
He eventually stopped and brought his face to mine for kisses. I was ecstatic. I was so, so happy that we finally did it. I was beaming.
He seemed glad but not like anything remarkable had happened. I was confused. I wanted him to be as happy as I was.
"Do you remember the other day when I finally came on your tongue?" I just asked him. "How did you feel?"
He's naked in the bedroom, with boxes--we're still moving. "Really, really happy," he said.
"Do you remember I thought you weren't really happy?" I asked. "Why do you think I thought that?"
"I don't think it was something I said," he told me. "I think it was something about my expression?"
I thought about this. For our whole relationship, I have been so comforted by his touch, and words are secondary. In two weeks I'm leaving on a trip, and we'll only have the phone. I don't know how I'll survive because when we talk on the phone, it's like he's a different person. It doesn't even feel like him.
I remember a long time ago, when we were on our trip and everything was new, I was so worried things between us weren't okay, but when he held my hand, everything was okay. We circumvented language.
I'm getting sleepy, and I think I'll end here. I just wanted to tell you it finally happened, and my heart is open to him.
But once he asked, "I wonder how you taste fresh out of the shower?" and I shyly let him taste.
So he went down on me a good handful of times, and I did like it--I did like how it felt, those slow figure eights, and up and down, and side to side, quicker, hard, so gentle it almost tickled...
But I knew I wouldn't come. Once I was close, and it just didn't happen.
But a few days ago, he was licking me. I lay relaxed on my back. He was between my legs, doing with his tongue the things he likes to do, and I felt the need growing within me. He seemed insistent, like he knew it was going to happen this time--assertive, almost aggressive. I was very curious.
I think I hadn't come on his tongue before because I wouldn't let myself relax. Maybe I just didn't know him well enough? Well, that can't be true because I remember a long time ago--the summer I was 16--coming on the tongue of a near-stranger. That was 19 years ago. And I fell in love with that man, that night, on the ground beside the tennis courts at the summer art school where he was an actor and I was a writer, both of us a long way from home.
But I was already quite in love with this M, anarchist boyfriend. And as I lay there on my back in our bedroom--the bedroom we had shared for less than two weeks--we'd had our first at-home sex there, so comfortable and finally, finally safe, not worrying about his roommate's footsteps on the stairs, not furtive--I finally relaxed.
Sex can be about tension, maintaining an intensity, but it feels good to relax in the middle of it, to relax emotionally.
So he was doing his intent work on my clitoris, insistent, and I let go. It went on for a long time, and I admired his drive.
Then I could tell I was probably going to come. Then I could tell I was going to come. I felt a little scared, but it was going to happen. I think my sounds indicated that I was going to come--he knew, and he responded with enthusiasm, heartened.
Then I was coming on his tongue. It was amazing, and it was too much. I wanted him to back off but not stop, but I had no way of communicating that. I reached down to my cunt and pressed my labia together with my fingers. His enthusiasm was undeterred. I was overcome with emotion.
He eventually stopped and brought his face to mine for kisses. I was ecstatic. I was so, so happy that we finally did it. I was beaming.
He seemed glad but not like anything remarkable had happened. I was confused. I wanted him to be as happy as I was.
"Do you remember the other day when I finally came on your tongue?" I just asked him. "How did you feel?"
He's naked in the bedroom, with boxes--we're still moving. "Really, really happy," he said.
"Do you remember I thought you weren't really happy?" I asked. "Why do you think I thought that?"
"I don't think it was something I said," he told me. "I think it was something about my expression?"
I thought about this. For our whole relationship, I have been so comforted by his touch, and words are secondary. In two weeks I'm leaving on a trip, and we'll only have the phone. I don't know how I'll survive because when we talk on the phone, it's like he's a different person. It doesn't even feel like him.
I remember a long time ago, when we were on our trip and everything was new, I was so worried things between us weren't okay, but when he held my hand, everything was okay. We circumvented language.
I'm getting sleepy, and I think I'll end here. I just wanted to tell you it finally happened, and my heart is open to him.
Friday, June 8, 2012
grapefruit
Oh, we had a fight. He got really angry in the kitchen, and I got scared. I cried and cried as he was in the bedroom napping or using the computer or both. I had had a visceral reaction to his anger, something about when I was a kid. I hid my reaction because I thought I needed to.
So I got stuck, unable to move forward or back. I drank water and stared out the window as I cried. I tried to cry quietly because I didn't want to upset him more. This doesn't actually make sense. I was getting confused again.
But eventually we talked, and he comforted me. I told most of the truth about what scared me. Later, as we drove home from the garden in my truck, I told more of the truth: how I had been afraid for the future. If my problems weren't compatible with his problems. How often would he do this, and could I live like that?
So we went to the garden after we got gas. I planted a large basil while he dumped compost. And we came home and I regular blogged and took a shower and we ate dinner of leftover rice & lentils.
"Can I juice your grapefruit?" I asked. The grapefruit had been around a while.
"How would you do that?" he asked.
"I would squeeze it!" I said. But he wanted the grapefruit to eat out of hand. "Can I peel it for you?" I asked. So I peeled it and ate two segments--they were delicious.
Then he wanted chocolate coffee ice cream, but I didn't want to walk to the co-op. "Actually, I'm feeling a little amorous?" I said.
"Oh, never mind, then," he said. We stood up together, and I pushed him against the door. We kissed. Then he turned me around and pushed me up against the door. He held my arms up, held me by the wrists the way he knows I like. We kissed.
Then he had to pee, and I saw him in the bathroom. He sat on the seat with his cock between his legs, and I wanted to watch, but he didn't seem to be going. "I need to drink more water," he said.
"Can I get you water?" I asked. So I got him water and let him pee in peace.
In the bedroom, I told him I wanted to lie down and for him to lick my nipples for a long time. He said he could do that.
He licked and touched my nipples, and it felt so good. My right hand automatically went to my cunt. He was on my left. I explored myself. Yes, it was very wet there. Yes, my clitoris was large.
"I'm thinking about you putting a condom on your fingers and sticking them in my ass," I said. He seemed to consider that. I enjoyed the idea.
"I'm also thinking about having sex with you and N at the same time," I said.
"Tell me about it," he said.
"I'm afraid of hurting your feelings," I said.
"No, you're not," he said. "I mean, I hear you're afraid, but you don't need to be."
"Okay," I said. I explained how I wanted her to touch my breasts the way he was touching my breasts as he fucked me selfishly.
"That turns you on, doesn't it?" he asked.
"Absolutely," I said.
I explained how I wanted him to stick his cock up inside me then inside her, one then the other and back again. I explained how I wanted her to suck his cock while I watched. I explained how I wanted to go down on her while he fucked me from behind.
"I love you," I said.
"Tell her that," he said.
"I love you, N," I said. For years I have been fantasizing about being in bed with her, and I have masturbated while begging her for her body in my mind for years.
I moved his hand to my cunt. I made him touch me the way I touch myself. He brought me to the edge, and I didn't want to come yet. I stopped him. Again I made him take me to the edge and stopped him. I had my arms around him, and I caressed his body in a dreamy way. Then finally, I did let him make me come. I grabbed him as the waves of pleasure hit me, one after another. The feelings were so real.
As I regained myself, I held my hand to my nose. "The smell of the grapefruit is mixed up with mine, and it smells really good!" I said. I held my hand to his nose so he could smell it too.
I had never felt so close to him. "I feel like I can tell you anything," I said later.
"You can," he said. And he said he was sorry for getting angry earlier. I smiled.
He pet my hair, and like usual, I asked him to tell me I'm a very, very, very good girl. He did. I asked him to tell me he likes the way I suck his cock. He did. I asked him to tell me, "I approve of you." He validated me.
So I got stuck, unable to move forward or back. I drank water and stared out the window as I cried. I tried to cry quietly because I didn't want to upset him more. This doesn't actually make sense. I was getting confused again.
But eventually we talked, and he comforted me. I told most of the truth about what scared me. Later, as we drove home from the garden in my truck, I told more of the truth: how I had been afraid for the future. If my problems weren't compatible with his problems. How often would he do this, and could I live like that?
So we went to the garden after we got gas. I planted a large basil while he dumped compost. And we came home and I regular blogged and took a shower and we ate dinner of leftover rice & lentils.
"Can I juice your grapefruit?" I asked. The grapefruit had been around a while.
"How would you do that?" he asked.
"I would squeeze it!" I said. But he wanted the grapefruit to eat out of hand. "Can I peel it for you?" I asked. So I peeled it and ate two segments--they were delicious.
Then he wanted chocolate coffee ice cream, but I didn't want to walk to the co-op. "Actually, I'm feeling a little amorous?" I said.
"Oh, never mind, then," he said. We stood up together, and I pushed him against the door. We kissed. Then he turned me around and pushed me up against the door. He held my arms up, held me by the wrists the way he knows I like. We kissed.
Then he had to pee, and I saw him in the bathroom. He sat on the seat with his cock between his legs, and I wanted to watch, but he didn't seem to be going. "I need to drink more water," he said.
"Can I get you water?" I asked. So I got him water and let him pee in peace.
In the bedroom, I told him I wanted to lie down and for him to lick my nipples for a long time. He said he could do that.
He licked and touched my nipples, and it felt so good. My right hand automatically went to my cunt. He was on my left. I explored myself. Yes, it was very wet there. Yes, my clitoris was large.
"I'm thinking about you putting a condom on your fingers and sticking them in my ass," I said. He seemed to consider that. I enjoyed the idea.
"I'm also thinking about having sex with you and N at the same time," I said.
"Tell me about it," he said.
"I'm afraid of hurting your feelings," I said.
"No, you're not," he said. "I mean, I hear you're afraid, but you don't need to be."
"Okay," I said. I explained how I wanted her to touch my breasts the way he was touching my breasts as he fucked me selfishly.
"That turns you on, doesn't it?" he asked.
"Absolutely," I said.
I explained how I wanted him to stick his cock up inside me then inside her, one then the other and back again. I explained how I wanted her to suck his cock while I watched. I explained how I wanted to go down on her while he fucked me from behind.
"I love you," I said.
"Tell her that," he said.
"I love you, N," I said. For years I have been fantasizing about being in bed with her, and I have masturbated while begging her for her body in my mind for years.
I moved his hand to my cunt. I made him touch me the way I touch myself. He brought me to the edge, and I didn't want to come yet. I stopped him. Again I made him take me to the edge and stopped him. I had my arms around him, and I caressed his body in a dreamy way. Then finally, I did let him make me come. I grabbed him as the waves of pleasure hit me, one after another. The feelings were so real.
As I regained myself, I held my hand to my nose. "The smell of the grapefruit is mixed up with mine, and it smells really good!" I said. I held my hand to his nose so he could smell it too.
I had never felt so close to him. "I feel like I can tell you anything," I said later.
"You can," he said. And he said he was sorry for getting angry earlier. I smiled.
He pet my hair, and like usual, I asked him to tell me I'm a very, very, very good girl. He did. I asked him to tell me he likes the way I suck his cock. He did. I asked him to tell me, "I approve of you." He validated me.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
post-sex questions
nest: Do you remember the day you rode your bike to meet me at the park? Did you know I wanted you to fuck me then?
boyfriend: I think I knew.
nest: I remember how badly I wanted to hug you.
boyfriend: I think I went home and masturbated, thinking about hugging you.
***
nest: When did you believe we would become lovers?
boyfriend: When we went on the trip together, I thought we would become lovers.
nest: You're smart. You're very smart. I didn't know.
***
nest: I have a question, but it's a tricky question because I'm not sure what I want the answer to be.
boyfriend: Okay.
nest: That night I said I wanted to get lost, and we did get lost, did you get lost on purpose?
boyfriend: Yeah--I had an idea of where we were going.
nest: Oh!
boyfriend: What do you think of them apples?
nest: They're shiny and delicious-looking.
***
nest: Do you remember when I called you the night you sent me that long email saying you wanted to step in front of light rail?
boyfriend: Yes.
nest: You didn't want to talk to me very long.
boyfriend: I loved you already.
nest: I loved you too. I was just thinking that.
boyfriend: I think I knew.
nest: I remember how badly I wanted to hug you.
boyfriend: I think I went home and masturbated, thinking about hugging you.
***
nest: When did you believe we would become lovers?
boyfriend: When we went on the trip together, I thought we would become lovers.
nest: You're smart. You're very smart. I didn't know.
***
nest: I have a question, but it's a tricky question because I'm not sure what I want the answer to be.
boyfriend: Okay.
nest: That night I said I wanted to get lost, and we did get lost, did you get lost on purpose?
boyfriend: Yeah--I had an idea of where we were going.
nest: Oh!
boyfriend: What do you think of them apples?
nest: They're shiny and delicious-looking.
***
nest: Do you remember when I called you the night you sent me that long email saying you wanted to step in front of light rail?
boyfriend: Yes.
nest: You didn't want to talk to me very long.
boyfriend: I loved you already.
nest: I loved you too. I was just thinking that.
what I say to you in my mind
I love you.
I want you.
I would give anything to feel you up inside me.
I would give anything to feel you fucking me.
Please give yourself to me.
I've wanted you for so long.
I've loved you for so long.
I want you.
I would give anything to feel you up inside me.
I would give anything to feel you fucking me.
Please give yourself to me.
I've wanted you for so long.
I've loved you for so long.
what I like about sucking your cock
I like nuzzling your balls with my
nose. It's loving.
I like the way you smell.
I like kissing your cock up and down.
I like licking you.
I like taking just the head of your cock in my mouth.
I like taking it all the way.
I like gagging on you and when the tears run down my face.
I like sucking.
I like changing the angle of my approach.
I like feeling my lips around the base of your cock.
I like listening to your breathing change and to the sounds you make, when you make sounds.
I like when your cock gets very big and trying to predict when you'll come.
I like tasting your pre-come and feeling its slickness.
I like when my breasts graze your balls.
I like looking up at you and holding onto your sides or your ass, touching your chest as I suck.
I like making you come.
I like the way you look, when you come.
I like your body and how it fits with mine.
I like your cock in my mouth as if that's its natural habitat.
I like the way you smell.
I like kissing your cock up and down.
I like licking you.
I like taking just the head of your cock in my mouth.
I like taking it all the way.
I like gagging on you and when the tears run down my face.
I like sucking.
I like changing the angle of my approach.
I like feeling my lips around the base of your cock.
I like listening to your breathing change and to the sounds you make, when you make sounds.
I like when your cock gets very big and trying to predict when you'll come.
I like tasting your pre-come and feeling its slickness.
I like when my breasts graze your balls.
I like looking up at you and holding onto your sides or your ass, touching your chest as I suck.
I like making you come.
I like the way you look, when you come.
I like your body and how it fits with mine.
I like your cock in my mouth as if that's its natural habitat.
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