Saturday, December 2, 2017

the place I go when I sing

"How many times do you think you could make her come, in an hour?" I was in bed with anarchist boyfriend talking about the latest fantasy about the new girlfriend. 

The idea was that we three would go out to dinner then back to her place, where he would fuck her while I read and wrote at her kitchen table.

"Three," he said.  I imagined them in the bedroom, trying to be quiet, trying to make the best use of their hour, excited and happy.

"How would you make her come?" I asked.

"With my dick, rubbing up against her clit, pushing in and out of her hole," he said.  "And with my tongue."

"How about the third time?" I asked.

"With my fingers," he said.

"Would you like me there in the kitchen, so nearby?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said. 

"How often would you want to get your dick sucked by her and to fuck her?" I asked.

"Ten times a week," he said.

"You'd want to go every day?" I asked, surprised.

"Yeah," he said.

"How often would you want to get your dick sucked by me and to fuck me?" I asked.

"Twenty times a week," he said.

"Would you become a hornier person from having her?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"How would you lick her pussy?" I asked.

"First I would lick her lips.  Then I would push my tongue between her lips and lick her clit..."

He was touching my nipples all this time, and it felt incredible.  We lay close in the bed, our bodies pressed together.

"When you fucked her, would you wear a condom?" I asked.

"No," he said.  "I would want my sperm to go up inside her."

I thought about that.  It's a fantasy--he doesn't need a condom.

"Would you tell her your loved her?" I asked.

"No," he said.

"Why not?" I asked.

"I only love you," he said.  I was surprised when he said that.

"Would she give you better blow jobs than mine?" I asked.

"No," he said.

"But what if she gave you better blow jobs than mine?" I asked.  "Would you lie to me?"

"No," he said.

"What if her blow jobs made you love her?" I asked.

"They wouldn't," he said.

Then he wiggled up on the bed.  "Are you trying to get me to blow you now?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

I had been touching his dick and playing with his balls.  Caressing his hip then back to his dick, his balls, squeezing them, back to his hip.

I smelled him there.  "You smell good," I said.

"What do I smell like?" he asked.

"Like love," I said.

"Suck my dick," he said.  "Please."

"There's a little bit of precome," I said.  "It's slippery."  I rubbed the precome up and down.

Then I licked his dick and sucked at it.  I blew him and stopped.  He touched my nipples and I put spit on my hand and rubbed the head of his dick with my palm.  "That feels so good," he said.

I blew him and gagged.  The slippery spit moved to the front of my mouth.

"Do you want to come?" I asked him.  "Do you want me to make you come?"

"Yes," he said.  "I want you to swallow my come."

Eventually he did come in my mouth.  I moved myself up and down on his dick as it spasmed in my mouth.  I swallowed.  His beautiful semen was in me.

"Do you like those big tits?" I asked as he rubbed my nipples.

"Yeah," he said.

"Are they pretty for you?" I asked.

"They're beautiful for me," he said.

I was rubbing my clit, which felt plump and slippery. 

"What do you want me to say when I come?" I asked.

"I want you to say my name," he said.  "Look at me."

I said his name.  I chanted it and asked it as if I was begging, as if he was the one who was going to make me come.

Eventually the waves pounded inside me and I said his name as I came.  Then language was lost and I couldn't look at him anywhere.  I went somewhere else, but still with him, like to the place I go when I sing.

Thursday, November 30, 2017

new girlfriend

I have a new fantasy.  It had been a long time since I came up with a new one.  It's very simple. 

What are the past common fantasies?

1.  Goldilocks being fucked by the three bears
2.  Snow White being fucked by all seven dwarves
3.  the kid watching the horses
4.  five minutes in the closet with friends
5.  hotel fantasy with a specific friend
6.  doing it with Shiva
7.  your standard rape fantasy
8.  night visits

My new fantasy is based on this dream I had a while back.  He gets a new girlfriend.  She's super nice.  We three all go out to dinner together.  Then we go back to her place, and he fucks her quietly in the bedroom while I sit at her kitchen table writing and reading.  I know what they're doing in there.

It happens once or twice a week, him fucking her.  It's enjoyable for him to have another girlfriend, and he is deeply satisfied and happy.  The other girlfriend and I are keeping him happy.

It's so low-drama.  What a fantasy!  If only life could be so simple.

Sometimes we're having sex and I'm having a fantasy about him telling me about wanting to fuck other people.  It's a fantasy about language.  I'm getting off on imagined words.  It seems too much trouble to ask him to say the words, so I just imagine him saying them as I get hornier and hornier.

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

night visits, five minutes in the closet

I

I want to tell you about my fantasy that she comes to stay over and every night Boyfriend leaves my side to fuck her while I'm sleeping.  He gets up in the night anyway--I'm used to him leaving, returning.

Every night he goes to her room, wakes her up, and fucks her as quickly and quietly as possible, then leaves.

But the final night--she is leaving the next day--he lingers with her after fucking her, then licks her pussy.  He's licking with so much joy in his heart, but she's making small sounds, and he gets scared.  He needs her to be quiet.

He hesitates, and she pushes down on his head, telling him to keep licking her clit.  She's close to coming, and he's never seen her come before.

He's intrigued and wants to please her, yet he's scared what will happen.  She starts to come, and he pushes on her clit with his tongue.  His face turns red as she cries out.  It's the middle of the night, and did she wake me up?

The fantasy has a few different endings.  I wake up and look for him.  I find him in her room and cry.  Or he licks my pussy next.  Or something like that.

II

I also want to tell you the fantasy about five minutes in the closet.  Five minutes is kind of a long time.  I've never played this in real life.  I wonder in real life how it would be.  Some conversation, or right to kissing and groping?  Or just groping? just a blow job?  And how does consent work, in the closet, where it must be dark...I wonder.

And what else is in the closet?  Hopefully not a mop and broom.  Hopefully no spiders.

Anyway, stop being so realistic, Anarchist Girlfriend.

We're over at her house, and her spouse isn't home, but our mutual friend is.  "Do you want to play a game?" she asks.  It's after lunch and we want to spend more time together.

We consider the board games and card games she has in a pile.  We think about it, but I don't really like games.  "How about spin the bottle?" I ask shyly.

There's an empty bottle on the table, and she spins it.  It points at our mutual friend.  They smile.  She walks over to him, leans over toward him.  He stands up, and they kiss.  It's been a long time since they kissed.  They feel excited.

Then our mutual friend spins the bottle.  It points at Anarchist Boyfriend.  He walks over to him and they have a brief kiss.

Then Boyfriend spins the bottle.  It points at her.  How will I feel when he kisses her, his dick erect in his pants?

They've been wanting this for a long time.  They both stand up and step toward one another.  They embrace, their upper bodies together and lower bodies too.  They cautiously kiss, but their mouths open, and they lick at each other with the passion of years of tension.  I feel sort of hurt and sort of excited.  Happy for them but jealous as he pushes against her for a little too long.

They detach from one another reluctantly.  Boyfriend's heart is pounding.  He smiles at me, and I can almost hear him tell me, "This was a good idea!"

She spins the bottle and it points at me.  We smile and I actually quietly laugh.  I remember ten years before, when our friendship was newer and more seemed possible.  I always wanted to be her girlfriend, but how would that have worked?  It couldn't have worked.

We step toward one another, and my cunt is aching.  We hug each other like always, but for longer, and then we kiss, and it's a relief from twelve years of wanting.

It's cuddly and sweet yet she slips her tongue in my mouth and I feel loved.

We stop and step away from one another, look at each other, and I feel something important has finally happened.  I feel serious.

I don't spin the bottle.  I sit down and take a deep breath.  "How about five minutes in the closet?" I suggest.  They're agreeable, and we designate a room as the closet.

I spin the bottle, and it points to our mutual friend.  I have always wanted to have sex with him, but is the time right?

We go to the room together and I say, "What do you think?"

"I think you should give me a blowjob," he says, and he hugs me tight.  We kiss.  It's our first time kissing, and it doesn't feel like I thought it would.

I take off my shirt and bra.  "Do you think they're really timing us?" I ask.  I imagine them in the other room, and what are they doing anyway?

He's unfastening his pants.  My cunt is throbbing.  He pulls down his pants and underwear, and his huge dick is there for me to look at, so plump and real.

He stares at my tits and gently touches them.

What should I do?  I'm thinking about his dick in my hands, in my mouth.  Should I go through with it?  What if I can't make him come quickly enough and we're interrupted?  Is this a stupid idea?

I touch it.  He's sitting on the couch.  He takes off his glasses and puts them on the small table.

I get on my knees and begin the blowjob.  It's been a long time since I've interacted with an intact dick, and the foreskin throws me off, but I get the hang of it.

He's clearly happy.  He quietly moans.  "Shhh," I say.  I wonder if they can hear us, in the other room.

I can't get his dick very far in my mouth, it's so big.  I've never seen one this big in real life.  He'd told me it was huge, but I wasn't sure I believed him.

It takes some work, and I'm happy to do the work.  I think of all the other women who have blown him.  I feel a confusing mixture of feelings.

Then his breathing changes and I'm relieved he's going to come, but should I let him come in my mouth?  I hold him in my hands as his huge thing ejaculates on my chest.  His come drips onto my tits, and there are tissues on the small table, so I wipe up his semen as he glows.  We smile at one another.

We dress quickly and I put the wet tissues in my pants pocket.

We return to the other room.  "Has it been five minutes?" I ask breathlessly.

They laugh.  "More like 15," she says, and I feel grateful that no one walked in on us.

"Whose turn is it to spin the bottle?" I ask, confused.

"To hell with the bottle," she says.  "I want to blow your boyfriend."

I figure they've been talking about it while the mutual friend and I were in the other room.  Boyfriend looks at me, wondering what my reaction will be.  I love him so much and want him to get what he wants.

My pussy is all wet from when I was blowing our mutual friend.  "Go for it," I say.  "But only five minutes."

Those two go into the other room, and I get some water from the kitchen.  Mutual friend and I hold hands at the table.

They strip so quickly and are kissing and rubbing at each other.  He touches her tits and sucks each nipple.  She reaches for his dick immediately, and it's hard in her hand.  Their bodies are so smooth and beautiful.  They caress each other's backs.

"Can I blow you?" she asks.

"Yes," boyfriend says.

She licks the underside the way he likes it, and he moans.  He wants to come so badly.

She fingers her wet clit and slowly takes all of his dick in her mouth.  She gags on it and he is in heaven.  It's just what he imagined.

She rubs and rubs herself as she blows and blows him.

I look at the clock.  Four minutes have passed.

"I want you in my pussy," she says, gasping.  She is near orgasm, and she wants a dick so badly up inside her.

They're both confused about whether this is allowed, and they don't really care.  He would love to pound her cunt and shoot his load there.

So she climbs on the couch on all fours, and he approaches behind her.  It's awkward, with the cushions.

He wonders if he should wear a condom as he always promised me, but there's no condom and they're in a rush.

He slips himself inside her, and her pussy clenched around his dick is the best feeling in the world.  She comes with a growl and her body spasms in his arms and he holds her from behind.

He's fucking her when I open the door.  He sees me and fucks her faster then shoots his load in her cunt as deeply as possible, eyes closed, grunting.

I feel glad I got to see it but hurt that he didn't use a condom.  They dress.

The fantasy could go a few different ways here.  My favorite is that Boyfriend and mutual friend decide to lick my pussy and her pussy respectively as we all are together in bed.  So she and I do get off, in the end.

Friday, December 30, 2016

what I didn't know I could do

Today we went out into the desert. I was daydreaming about sex. Boyfriend went on a hike without me. I sat in the car writing and imagining his body on me.

When we got home, he turned on the heater in the bedroom. In half an hour we took our clothes off and climbed into bed.

I wanted him to put the pear-scented body butter on my nipples. He warmed the tin of it beneath his chest then puts dollops of it onto his fingertips and rubbed it on my sensitive nipples.

In the winter our hands are cold. First he caresses me on my butt and hips where my underwear is so that he isn't in direct contact with my skin. I caress him and ask if my hands are too cold, and he says no.

My hands roamed all over his body and I touched his beautiful dick. I was having a fantasy about rubbing my cunt on his dick. He was rubbing the body butter on my nipples and it smelled delicious.

I asked him if I could rub my cunt on his dick and he said yes. First I sucked on it to get it wet.

Then I climbed on him and positioned myself with my cunt on his dick. I rubbed up and down. I pushed the head of his dick against my clitoris.

Meanwhile his hands were caressing my shoulders, my back, my hips and thighs. I felt loved and wanted.

I rubbed my cunt on his dick faster and asked him, "Do you want me to put it into me?"  He said yes so we together slid his dick into my hole.

He filled me completely. My nipples bumped up against his chest as I rode him.

Always before he would push down on my hips and come quickly. Today instead he caressed my body, and I pushed myself up against him in the ways that felt best for me.

I felt myself getting closer and closer to orgasm. I had never come on top of him like that. I wondered if I could do it.

"Oh my god," I whispered.

I pushed up against him and knew my orgasm was inevitable. I pushed again a few times and suddenly the waves were pounding through my body. I felt my cunt spasm around his dick. I concentrated with my entire will on not yelling or screaming.

I was so happy and delighted. I climbed off of him. My arms hurt. I relaxed and caressed his chest. "That was magical," I told him.

Saturday, October 29, 2016

spun

I bought some spun cinnamon honey at the farmers market.  It was in a little clear plastic bowl with a clear lid that clicked, and it came with a wooden thing--like a popsickle stick but wider and shorter.  I wanted him to put it on my nipples and lick it off.

So we undressed and caressed one another's naked bodies.  I took the lid off the honey and set it on a paper towel with the wooden thing.  His big dick looked so beautiful and I wanted to put honey on it and suck the honey off.

I asked him if I could, and he said yes.  "Does this feel okay?" I asked as I gently spread some honey on him with the wooden thing.

"Yes," he said.

It looked beautiful.  The head of his cock is so big, and it looked even bigger with a little honey gleaming on it.

I gently touched the honey with my fingers.  It was liquidy yet viscous like a nice lube but so much better because I knew I would like ingesting it.

I held his dick in my honeyed hand and masturbated him a little, spreading the honey around.  He liked it.  I licked his dick and tasted the honey for the first time.  I was curious about how much it would taste like cinnamon.  It was kind of subtle.

I sucked on the head of his dick enthusiastically.  I popped it in and out of my mouth.  Then I took him all the way and he liked that too.

I blew him in this way.  I put more honey on after a little while, again with the wooden thing, and how beautiful he looked.

When he came in my mouth, the come mixing with the honey, the good feelings of love.  His happiness and satisfaction.

Then I ate the rest of the honey with the wooden thing and it was so good.  I licked out every last bit.

Monday, August 8, 2016

horse

Tonight he told me this story.

There's a horse, and she's walking around.  She has great big labia.  (I giggle.)

Then there's another horse.  He has a great big dick.  Do you like to look at horse's dicks?  (I say I haven't looked at many but yes.)

So the little horse with the great big labia--I actually don't know how this works, because I haven't seen it--the big horse puts his dick into the little horse, and it's going to hurt.  He slides it in and out of her, and he ejaculates.  His come leaks out and drips into the ground...

(Tell me a story about the child watching the horses, I say.)

Thursday, February 18, 2016

slut

Yesterday we went to a record store that also has some books, and I was reading bits of books of erotica.  Some of it was cliche, but some of it was good.  

In one of the books, I read about a blowjob where the blowjobber made the man come three times.  That sounded really fun.

I told anarchist boyfriend about it.  Then I told him another story--there was a sex blogger who was a man who went to prostitutes.  He would make them get him off twice, and the second time was work.  I always remember that.  

I want to know the secrets of prostitutes.

We had sex, and then in the evening we had sex again.  I told him to ask me questions about my sexual past and then call me a slut for my answers.

It was fun.  When he called me a slut, it made my cunt ache.  I was touching his dick.  "Tell me about a time you played with someone's titties," he said.  "Did you like it?"

"Yeah, I liked it a lot," I said.  "I only had two girlfriends, and I really loved both of them.  Well, there was another...  I really like titties."

"You slut," he said.  

I laughed, but it turned me on.  

"Tell me about a time you sucked someone's dick and didn't like it," he said.

"Well, my first boyfriend, I didn't much like having sex with him at all.  I felt like I had to do it."

"You had to keep him happy?" anarchist boyfriend asked.

"I guess so.  More like I thought I was supposed to."

"You slut," he said.

Again I laughed.  I reminded him of the story of me losing my virginity in a costume room in a theater during a play.  I was on top.  

"Were your tits in his face?" anarchist boyfriend asked.

"I don't remember..." I said.

"You slut," he said.  

He wanted me to blow him, and when I began, he was so happy with me.  The head of his cock was so big in my mouth.  I held the base of his dick and concentrated on the head, moving my mouth around it, making it slippery with my spit, and he said, "Oh, that feels so good," over and over again.

Then I took him in all the way, gagging on him, and that excited him too.  I touched his thighs as I blew him.  I caressed his balls.  

I said I wanted him in me, hurting me, and I climbed on top.  He said he wanted my tits in his face.  I put him inside of me, and it did hurt.

"Look at my tits," I said as I rode him.

"You're beautiful," he said.

"Look at my hair," I said.  "Do you think it's pretty?"

"You're pretty," he said.  

"It hurts," I said.

He grabbed my hips and pushed me down on him in a new way, and it hurt more.  "Ow," I moaned.

"I'm going to come," he said.

"Call me a slut when you come," I said.

"You slut," he said.  We stopped moving and I could feel him coming inside me.  "You slut.  You slut."