Wednesday, May 15, 2013

the blow job

"I want to give you a blow job," I told him.

"Okay," he said.  We had been making out for a while, and his cock was nice and big.

"I want you to lie down and put your arms behind your head, like this," I told him.  I demonstrated with my elbows bent and my hands behind my head.

I used to think the phrase "blow job" was so nasty.  I guess I still think so, a nasty phrase for a beautiful act.  And I like that.

I touched his chest and tummy.  Then I caressed his legs.  Then I settled in with his cock.  I touched his balls.  And I starting licking his stiff cock.

"Are you comfortable?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.  I took him all the way into my mouth and did what I wanted to with him.  I made a rhythm with my sucking and the way I rode him with my mouth.  I would gag on him, back off, take it deep more, gag again.  The slick spit came from my throat, and I varied my speed and paid attention to his subtle cues of what he was liking best.

Because his hands were behind his head, I didn't have his hands to guide me or make me choke.  I really enjoy that, normally, but last night I wanted to be in control, for him to relinquish all control and just concentrate on the feelings.

I continued to go down on him, and his breathing changed.  "Tell me when you're going to come," I had told him before I started.  Then I corrected myself, "Tell me if you're going to come."  I didn't want him to feel pressured.

"I'm going to come soon," he warned me.  I continued but with more energy.

"I'm going to come," he told me, and he cried out as I felt his cock's first spasm, as hot come entered the entrance to my throat.  I continued as I felt spasm after spasm in my mouth.  And as he finished coming, I took a big swallow and swallowed it all.

I stayed there with his cock in my mouth for a while, feeling it relax.  Then I moved up the bed toward his head and kissed him.

"Did that feel good?" I asked.

"It felt great!" he said.

"Did you like that blow job?" I asked.

"I liked that blow job," he said.  I was so happy I had provided that experience for him.  I felt like a good girlfriend, and if I could keep giving him blow jobs like this, he would love me forever.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

the prostitute

"I want to talk to you about something, but I'm scared," I said.

"Mmhm," he said.

"Tell me I don't need to be scared...because you love me unconditionally and because nothing can shock you--you're a nurse."  I laughed because that's an old joke of ours.

"You don't need to be scared--I love you unconditionally, and nothing can shock me--I'm a nurse!" he said.

I'm always so afraid he's going to think I'm dirty because of my fantasies and stop loving me.  I don't know why I'm so afraid of that.  But maybe I get off on the fear too.

Eventually, after more comfort and false starts, I began.

"So," I said.  "Today's the day you're going to the prostitute.  You get to the hotel room and open the door.  What do you see?"

I got him to tell me my own fantasy.  We talked about the prostitute.

"What do you say?" I asked.

"Hello," he said.

We talked about what the prostitute looks like.  Boyfriend defered to me.

"What do you think she looks like?" he asks.

"She looks a lot like me, but with bigger tits," I said.  "And what does she do?"

"She turns down the covers on the bed and sits down next to me.  Then she starts fondling my penis."

"Through your pants?" I asked.

"Yes.  Then she unzips my pants and takes my cock out."

"Is it hard?" I asked, even though I knew the answer to that question.

"Yes," he said.

"Then what do you do?" I asked.

"I take my clothes off, and I take her clothes off."  When he said that, I felt a pang of jealousy because he never undresses me.

"Do you touch her tits?" I asked.

"Yes," he said.

"Then what?" I asked.

"Then she sucks my cock," he said.

"How does it feel?"

"It feels really good."

"Then what?" I asked.

"Why don't you tell me what happens next?" he asked.

"Okay," I said.  "She pushes you back on the bed and spreads the lips of her cunt around your cock.  She takes you all the way inside of her, and she begins to ride you."

This whole time I was touching his cock with my hand.  I kept putting more spit on my hand so it was nice and wet.

"Do you like that?" I asked.

"Yes," he said.

"So you're watching her tits bounce and move as she rides you," I said.  I paused and cuddled to him.

"Then what happens?" he asked.

"Then you come," I said.  "You pump her full of your come, and you like it."

We considered my story.  "I can't decide what happens next," I said.  "In some versions, you decide you want her to come, so you go down on her, but I don't know if she can come that way."

"She can come that way," he said.

"Okay, so what happens?" I asked.

"I go down on her, and she loves it."

"What does she do?" I asked.

"She moans and says my name," he said.

"She doesn't know your name," I said.

"Oh," he said.  "She moans and comes."

We consider his addition to the story.  "What next?" he asks.

"Then you put on your clothes and leave," I said.  "How did it feel to have sex with someone you didn't love?" I asked.

"Uncomfortable," he said.

"Oh no!" I said.  "I thought it would be fun!"  I thought telling him my fantasy of him fucking a prostitute would satisfy some of his need for novelty and he could feel more free.  I thought one of the main goals of seeing a prostitute was that you could do things you couldn't do with your wife.  But maybe he wasn't deep enough into the fantasy to realize that?  Or maybe he already does everything he wants to, with me?

"How does having sex with me feel different?" I asked.  "It's loving?"

"It's loving.  It's comfortable.  It's happy.  It's safe," he said.

I keep looking for the dark underbelly of his sexual desires and not finding it.  I would like a good rape scene.  Does it not exist, or is it there and I'll never see it?

Saturday, March 9, 2013

wishing for him

We were at my parents' house, in the bedroom I lived in as a child and teenager.  We were in bed, and he was kneeling over me, masturbating fast.  I watched his hand moving on his cock.  I could tell from his breathing how he was close to coming.

"I want you to come on my tits," I said.  "I want you to come all over me.  I want your come to go wherever it goes.  I want it on my face."

Immediately he was ejaculating on me.  I felt his come spurting fast and hard on my face, so warm, and then felt it dripping onto my tits.

I was so happy.  "Your come sprayed on my face," I said.  I moved his hand to the semen on my face so he could feel it.  "That was the hottest thing ever."

Later I told him how it was in this very room that I masturbated as a kid and teenager, wishing for him.

two stories about Maria

This is the longer favorite Maria fantasy.

"It's night, and I'm going to be away.  Maria has her first date with you alone.  In the morning I go down on you and make you come because you're so excited you get to fuck her that night," I say.

"So I leave and she comes over," I say.  "What's the first thing you want to happen?"

"I want you to show up," you say, so sweet.

"No, this is about you and her," I say.  I feel loved that you want me there.  But it really turns me on to imagine you together alone.

"What do you want to do with her?"

"I want her to suck my cock," you say.  I am so turned on by your desire for her.

"I like to imagine her sucking your cock," I tell you.  "Do you want her to suck it slowly?"

"Yeah," you say.

"I like to imagine her sucking your cock so slowly, taking you all the way in, making you feel so good," I say.  This whole time I'm touching your erection.  "I like her lips around the base of your cock and her hands caressing your balls while she goes down on you."

"Do you like that?" I ask.

"Yeah," you say.

"Then you go down on her," I tell him.  "You make her feel so good with your tongue.  She's moaning for you.  She's so wet for you.  She wants you as much as you want her."

"Then she climbs on top of you," I say.  "She parts the lips of her cunt and slips you inside of her.  She slides you in all the way."

"Do you like that?" I ask.

"Yeah," you say again.  I am so turned on by the conversation.  My cunt aches with love.  I'm flooded with lust as if I were Maria.

"She rides you.  You hold onto her hips, and you pump yourself inside of her.  You look at her big tits as she rides you.  You look at their movement.  You push your cock up into her as she bounces her cunt around you again and again."

"Do you like that idea?" I ask.

"Yes," you say.  I like how excited you are in my hand.

"Then she comes for you," I say.  "She's coming on your cock.  You're so happy to watch her come.  And then before you know what's happening, you're pushing up as hard as you can and shooting her full of your come."

"Do you want that?" I ask.

"Yes," you say.  We feel so happy.  Then I move myself down to your cock and suck your cock, and you moan for me.  I push my big tits around your cock, and my nipples graze your thighs.  You come in my mouth, and I swallow every drop of your loved semen.

This is the powerful shorter Maria fantasy.

"One night I go out, and Maria comes over," I say.  "We have our relationships set up so the three of us have sex together sometimes.  But never just the two of you.  We have agreed to that."

"But one night when I'm not home, she comes over," I say.  "She wants you, and you want her.  You kiss.  You go into the bedroom and take off all your clothes.  You embrace each other, and you move to the bed.  You're above her, and you fuck her, and you fuck her hard."

I'm touching your cock as I tell you this story, and again, I'm happy to feel your excitement.

"Then I come home earlier than you expected," I say.  "You hear me at the door.  And I can hear your moans and her moans as you fuck her."

Here I pause.  My favorite part of the story is next.

"I walk into the bedroom and see you fucking her.  You look up at me.  And you begin to fuck her harder and faster.  You want to come in her.  You're looking me in the eye as you fuck her.  Then you come, and I hear you cry out as you fill her with your come."

I feel so turned on to have told you this story.  I feel vulnerable to have shared my fantasy with you.  We have sex more, and we come, and I am happy that my fantasy is now in your mind and has turned you on.

Later you want to know what I like about that story.  "I like that what you're doing is totally wrong," I say.  "In real life, it would be horrible if you did that.  But in my fantasy, it's the hottest possible thing."

You suggest it's the transgression, and I agree.  "It's just the ultimate betrayal," I say.  "I like when you look up at me.  You don't stop--you don't apologize or try to explain.  You just fuck her harder and make eye contact with me as you pump her full of your come."

I really like these stories.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

in love

Night before last we were in bed and I can't remember everything we did--it's a beautiful hot blur.  But something we did that was really special for me is we looked at porn together, and it was good.  I liked the sounds the porn actors made, and I liked their movements.

Then I did something I have wanted to do for years--I sucked his cock while we watched the porn.  I liked hearing the moaning and words of the porn actors mixed in with his moans.  I liked his cock in my mouth as he watched.  I liked knowing what he was seeing and knowing his sexual desire as I sucked.  I had been abstractly wanting to do that for a long time, since before I met him, and finally I was safe enough with him to realize that need.  I was so happy.  I had the feeling that I could have everything I needed, with him.

Yesterday we went on a long drive, and I couldn't stop thinking about sex.  Oh, something else wonderful that happened night before last is we invented a male playmate for us to have.  For a long time we have had Maria, the woman who we bring to bed with us in our imaginations.  We have so much fun with her.  I will have to tell you my hottest fantasy about her some other time.

But the man we invented to have sex with is named Eduardo.  We talked about him watching anarchist boyfriend fuck me.  He sat to the side and masturbated while he watched.  "What does his cock look like?" I asked.  "Is it very big?"

"No, it's kind of stubby," anarchist boyfriend said.

"Is it veiny?" I asked.

"No, it's smooth," he said.  "But it's got good color."

Later anarchist boyfriend said something about Eduardo coming on my foot.  And boyfriend said something about Eduardo fucking me.  "Are we ready for that?" I asked.

And yesterday I couldn't stop thinking about sex in the car.  My mind played through numerous fantasies, and I couldn't stop.  I told anarchist boyfriend that it was almost pathological.  In a way I felt close to him, because the fantasies included him, but in a way I was in my own world.

So I was thinking about sex a lot, and I was deliriously happy.  I told boyfriend a little about what was on my mind.  We we caressed one another's arms as we drove.  He reached for my thigh.  I touched my own nipples through my shirt.  I reached for his cock in his pants, and it was hard.  "Is this too distracting?" I asked, and he said no.

But he got too sleepy to drive, and we pulled over.  We made out, kissing a lot, his hands finding my nipples, and I was so horny.  He was too.  I liked being there with him, by the side of the road, slightly distracted by watching for cars out of the corner of my eye, hoping a cop wouldn't see us there, badly wanting to masturbate and not letting myself.

I wanted to tell him the fantasy I kept coming back to and building upon.  But I was scared, and I thought it might be good to save it for a time we could really have sex.

But I did tell him how happy I had been to go down on him while he watched porn.  I tried to explain why it had meant so much to me.  I put my hand on my heart and looked for the words.

"It was really hot?" he suggested.

"Well, yeah," I said.  "But something other than that too.  It was really...tender."  I had been so happy to do something I had wanted to do for years and to do it with him.  "You give me everything I need," I said.  "You're everything I ever wanted."

I kept living in the fantasy world of sex until I took over the driving and couldn't concentrate on sex anymore, though many thoughts of sex did cross my mind.  We arrived at my parents' house and spent time with family.

Then it was finally bedtime, and I was pleased.  We started to make out, and I reached for his cock.  He slipped off his chonies.  I went down on him.  I was so glad to finally have him in my mouth.  I thought of my fantasies but didn't tell him any.  I touched licked my hand and touched his cock with my wet hand.  Then I went down on him again.  Then I touched him with my hand again.

"Can I tell you a dirty story?" I asked.

"Sure," he said.

"Well, it's not dirty," I said.  "It's sweet."  Where could I begin?  I began.

"We have J over, and we all decide to cuddle and see what happens," I started.  J is our friend who I met on okcupid maybe nine months ago.  We have spent time with her in person just  handful of times and have always enjoyed it.  We email pretty regularly.  She is younger than us and a very lively, kind person who is interested in all sorts of things.  I am not sure where our friendship is headed.  We might be destined for a good, solid friendship without sex, but it's true we met on okcupid.  She has a girlfriend she lives with.

"We have a couch in the livingroom," I continue.  "So we sit on either side of her, and we begin to caress her.  We touch her back and her arms.  We touch her hair, and we touch the side of her face."  I touched the side of my own face.  "She touches us too."

"Then we decide to take our shirts off, and to take our bras off," I continue.  "We touch one another's naked backs.  We touch one another's shoulders.  We touch one another's chests.  You embrace her, and you feel her little tits against your chest.  I embrace her too, and I feel her little tits against my larger ones.  Then I reach for her nipples and she reaches for mine.  We squeeze each other's nipples, and it feels so good.  We kiss.  You watch us kiss.  And you two kiss too as I watch."

"Do you like this story?" I ask.  This whole time I've been touching his cock with my hand.

"Yes," he says.

"Then we take the rest of our clothes off," I continue.  "You sit on the couch with your legs spread wide, and she and I kneel between your legs.  We take turns sucking your cock.  First she moves her lips over the head of your cock.  Then she takes you all the way into her mouth to her throat.  She sucks your cock for maybe ten seconds.  Then I take over and suck your cock.  Then she sucks your cock more.  We keep trading off."  I like that part a lot.  I stop touching him with my hand to suck his cock for a moment.

"Then we decide to go to bed," I say.  "You lie on your back, and she climbs on top of you.  She opens the lips of her cunt and slides you all the way inside of her.  She begins to ride you.  Meanwhile I'm kissing you and caressing your hair like this."  I caress his head sweetly.  I can feel him getting more excited in my hand, and I wonder if my story will make him come.

"Then she begins to come, and we watch her and listen to her come," I tell him.  "Then you look at me, and we say we love each other.  Then you push up inside of her with all your strength, and you pump her full of your come."

My story is complete.  "Do you like my story?" I ask.

"Yes," he says.

"How much do you like it?" I ask.

"Very much," he says.

"Am I the best story teller ever?" I ask.

"You are," he says.  I begin to suck his cock, wanting him to come in my mouth, and finally I taste his semen in my mouth and feel his cock pulse.  I swallow every drop.

"Did you just come in my mouth?" I ask.

"Yes," he says.

"And did you like it when I swallowed your come?" I ask.

"Yes," he says.

Then I lie back and he touches my tits.  "Now you tell me the story," I say as I rub my clitoris and feel the slick wetness between the lips of my cunt.

I have never been this in love.

Sunday, January 20, 2013

everything

I love you because you make me yogurt and for your cock.

Smiles.

Oh wait, I love you for all the other stuff.

All the stuff other than making you yogurt and my cock?

Yeah.  Oh wait, I love you for everything.

Smiles.

What do you love me for?

Smiles.

Because I eat your yogurt and suck your cock?

I love you for everything.

Monday, December 17, 2012

all I wanted

We were on a long drive, and all I wanted was to get home and have sex.  "There's something I want that's embarrassing," I said.  I was afraid to tell him what it was.  But then I did tell him.

"I want you to masturbate close to my face and then shoot your come into my mouth." I said.  "And then I want to swallow it."

We made it home, and I took a quick shower.  When I went to the bedroom, he'd already lit a candle and was in the bed.  "What are you doing there?" I asked.

"Warming up the bed for you," he said.  He was wearing a teeshirt and underwear. When he sat up to take his shirt off, I cheered.

We kissed, and I caressed his cock.  It was large and hard.  He took off his underwear for me.  I was already naked.

Then he was on top of me, thrusting himself into me--a little deeper then a little deeper.  I was overjoyed.  "I want to come with you inside me," I told him, and he wanted that too.  I rubbed my clitoris with my fingers as I rubbed my body up against him.

Soon I was about to come.  "Come for me," he told me, and I did.  I was afraid, right before the waves of pleasure hit me--afraid of the vulnerability of it, afraid of feeling too much.  But then it was happening, and all I knew was happiness.

Then he moved his body toward my head and his cock close to my face.  He started to masturbate there.

"Is this what you wanted?" he asked.

 "Yeah," I said, and I watched him as well as I could from that close distance.  I looked at his hand on his cock, and I looked at his beautiful candlelit face.  As he got closer, I opened my mouth for him.

Then his come was squirting into my mouth.  I felt it hit my tongue and lips.  It felt its heat.  I was so satisfied by it.  I was dazzled by how perfect it was.  And then I remembered to swallow.

He got his teeshirt and wiped off his cock.  He wiped off my chin, which had come on it.  And we cuddled close.

"How long do you want to keep me?" I asked.

"Forever," he said.